Bo Diddley's essential guide to drugs, food, health, money, cows, and women


Wait, Bo Diddley was a sheriff?

Ah, yes he was, sort of:

He served for two and a half years as Deputy Sheriff in the Valencia
County Citizens’ Patrol; during that time he purchased and donated
three highway patrol pursuit cars.

This some concentrated-ass wisdom right hurr

1 Like

Women: The first thing you ask her is: “Are you alone?”

Different times, I guess.


Does Mr. Diddley have any advice on what the superior shape for a guitar is?

1 Like

I’m paraphrasing, but this is the advice Mr. Davis gave to his son, Miles:

whenever anyone pays you cash, no matter who it is, count it in front of them

this ought to be in grade school curriculum.

tangentially related: back when i was catering, I asked the quiet new guy (i.e. his first gig, the first words we ever exchanged) if he had a lighter so I could light the candles. he handed me a brass zippo. as I used it, I noticed it was inscribed:


“Trust no one, huh?” I said as i returned it to him. he kinda chuckled and said “yeah. words to live by.” turns out Errol was hilarious, but I’ll always remember that moment.

1 Like

And never get the cows and the women mixed up. This is important.


50% good advice.

  1. Nothing keeps your throat from drying up like the dehydrating effects of liquor, amirite?
    1a) No drugs? Guess that rules out Grand Mariner
    1b) Sorry Bo, you rule but I’ll take Jimi’s acid-fueled shredding over pretty much any guitarist, ever.

  2. Food: Agreed… but they didnt have 1 fast food restaurant for every American when Bo was around so take this advice with caution.

  3. Health: aspirin is actually quite a miraculous drug, but insisting on the Bayer brand? Weird.


  5. Defence: kicking > punching? o…kay. Guns: good advice.

  6. Cows: is this a euphemism? Otherwise… weird.

  7. Women: I dunno… sounds like he’s a bit of a dbag.

  8. Hearing: probably the subjects he’s most qualified to speak on.

Apparently he got sick of having his guitars stolen; that’s why he started making them square and ugly.

1 Like

Oblig. XKCD reference


“…so I stole his lighter.”

1 Like

Heh. Though his ass-wisdom doesn’t seem especially wise. Except for the part about not smelling like a goat.

HIs advice on food isn’t great, considering his Diabetes. Gotta watch what you eat carefully when you have it.

Kicking is better than punching presumably because you can play guitar more easily with broken feet than broken hands.

1 Like

That does seem a bit creepy. But out of morbid curiosity, what is it now? Pull out your mobile computer and see their facebook status?

ah… grok fail on my part!

I assumed the “…or I’d go broke” was because of potential litigation. My, how times have changed!

1 Like

True, times have changed. That’s why in the new century, we must adopt secret identities, don masks and DNA/print blocking costumes to fight crimes. (poses heroically)

This topic was automatically closed after 5 days. New replies are no longer allowed.