Computer game names "almost universally terrible"

boing
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Well, there you go.

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“It’s time to put an end to […] downright awful names everywhere,” said company founder Dr. Stephen Farts.

I categorically cannot move on from the fact that this happened.

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EAT THE BALLS

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ghost Land

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I’m rather surprised Warface didn’t get singled out for special treatment as it’s probably the worst name attached to a large-budget game I’ve encountered so far. Sounds like an insult crafted by a particularly dim 8 year old.

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Rock Paper Shotgun already ran that particular joke into the ground: http://www.rockpapershotgun.com/2012/06/05/warface-warface/

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Thank you, that list is legitimately poetry.

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I’d like to address the fact that the article is symptomatic for modern game journalism, providing an unstructured superfluous commentary which doesn’t even warrant looking at the games themselves.

Kinda like the “Worst covers” ones you could see everywhere not so long ago.

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“A rose by any other name would smell as sweet”

I am an avid gamer though this statement is purely anecdotal, my friends and I don’t buy games based off of names. Hell, I don’t buy anything based off of names. I own an number of games with the words “star” or “craft” (even in that order) but its the content that maters, not the dammed name.

I am also at a lost to think what part of the entertainment industry DOESN’T do this? Books and movies are just a guilty. Twilight out of context is just a time of day and is in no real way connected to the story. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s stone is a long winded title that tells you nothing meaningful about the content.

If a game had the the most cliche name ever but had a good trailer for it I would still buy it if the price was right and it was something I was interested in at the time. Not because the name was something crazy like Krul Skullfuckers Bloodorgy: Reckoning on Happiness Island

Names are made, not the other way around.

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Escape from the Planet of the Robot Monsters
Wiz ‘n’ Liz: The Frantic Wabbit Wescue
Mr Wobbly Leg Versus The Invaders From Space

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The longer this article sits with me the less I’m sure whether it is a parody or not. If the second Tomb Raider game is not supposed to be called Rise of the Tomb Raider and it also isn’t supposed to be called Tomb Raider 2, what it is supposed to be called? A new combination of words that does not even reference the fact that it is a sequel?

Am I missing something? Do so many people complain about bad game names that it was necessary to write a parody of people complaining about bad game names? Or is this serious? Can things even be divided into parodies and real things anymore?

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