This is the heart of why some men catcall. They do not believe women have agency.
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Or at least that a womanās sexuality isnāt a part of any agency, but rather a commodity to be bought sold, won, lost, stolen or awarded.
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My Senior year of college in New Orleans I biked or walked to school. It was about a 20 minute walk. I was catcalled EVERY SINGLE DAY. At first Iād flip the guys off, or make a smart comment, but after a while I just ignored it because it wasnāt very satisfying to even acknowledge the behavior.
The only time this ever happened when a guy was around was a day a classmate of mine happened to catch up with me on the way to school and we were walking together. He was someone Iād known for a long time. Someone catcalled me from a truck and he just went off. He was so angry. I told him to just ignore it. But it was refreshing how he reacted, actually. It made me realized that it wasnāt right, even if Iād gotten used to the abuse.
A few years after I graduated I told my dad about the constant catcalling and he refused to believe that it happened at all. It hurt my feelings a lot, but itās pretty typical of my dad to just negate emotions that make him uncomfortable.
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I never said it doesnāt happen. It happens a lot.
And my point saying many men donāt see it is that awareness needs brought to this issue because Iām guessing a large portion of men arenāt aware of how prevalent this is. Letās not assume most men know about that which most women are painfully aware of.
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Did you leave the second part of my statement out on purpose? I said a small minority of men do the vast majority of cat calling
It goes without saying it happens a lot.
But I guess I need to say it
IT HAPPENS A LOT, ITāS AWFUL, IT HAS TO STOP!
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No, thatās not true. Just because you say that, based on not being aware of the issue, doesnāt mean your assumption is more accurate than the actual experience of virtually every woman.
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Trust us, women already know this to be painfully, mortally true.
Talk to your brothers, you have to, because its obvious at this point no one is listening to women.
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Someone can call another beautiful in a public place, and not mean to
intimidate the person ā but if that makes the auditor feel
uncomfortable (as obviously it does for many) then it becomes
harassment.
Okay, but how is one stranger supposed to know that about another stranger?
That is precisely the problem. When people have a common culture itās easier. Nowadays, itās often impossible to know, and hence easy to offend (not to say that there arenāt plenty of people who are deliberately offensive, but thatās not what Iām talking about here)
Mustā¦ Notā¦ Say tooā¦ Muucā¦
Crap, the story is coming out if I want it to or not.
In college a friend of mine and me used to drive around the campus, honk at ādude brosā as we passed them, and enthusiastically wave at noone on the other side of the road.
The looks of disbelief and confusion were priceless. And hopefully at least one learned that being honked at is obnoxious.
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