Deposit "tips" that are actually fake money with Bible verses in the church collection plate


Originally published at:


Render unto Caesar the things that are Caesar’s, and unto God the things that are God’s.

A valuable Bible verse that seems to support this practice.


I just throw my money up in the air, God takes what he wants, and I keep the rest!

  1. Anyone who gives one of these with out an actual tip is an asshole.

  2. This is very Chick Tract-y. Many Christians would consider this tacky.

  3. Though waiting for the Disney Store to open on May 4th once, these people passed out pretty damn cool Star Wars themed dollar bills with bible quotes. Really nice quality, actually

  4. Sitting through 45-60min of a service that you’re getting nothing out of just to “stick” it to them when the collection plate comes around means you just let them get under your skin enough to waste not just your time, but turn you also into an asshole.

  5. My dad one time ran into a busy intersection because there was a $20 bill laying it. Turned out to be a business card that folded with one side looking like a $20.


I’m tempted to make up my own fake money with some of the weirder, darker Bible quotes.


Who’s going to pay me to attend?


Anyone who gives one of these out even with a reasonable tip is an asshole.


The only times that I am in a church are for weddings or funerals Where they don’t usually pass the collection plate.


There isn’t anything “fake”, everything is something, you just might not know what it is. (Hint: It is what it does.) Value is subjective, so the worth of any particular money is subjective. Personally, I find an actionable bit of advice for living to be of more value than “dollars”, which are literally “monopoly money”.

FWIW the word people are looking for is ersatz, which is a measure of perceived authenticity, rather than existence itself. That’s a wholly more interesting kind of discussion.


Giving away bills with those weird rules about food as a tip, like the ban on shellfish to a seafood restaurant, would be rather fun (if you added a regular tip too, of course).


I found one of these once in a bookstore, stuck inside a volume on non-Christian religions. It said “Disappointed? You wouldn’t be if you had JESUS!”

All I could think was that my former sister-in-law, who is super religious and also eternally broke, would have been far more disappointed than I was that this wasn’t really $20. (She currently has a GoFundMe up. The first sentence is “We trust that God will provide.”)


I wonder how the people who leave those notes in leiu of tips would feel if their waitstaff declined to bring them any dinner rolls or breadsticks, instead citing Matthew 4:4 (‘Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God.’)



When I was a waiter, we used to get wooden coins that said “Round Tuit” on one side, and “You always said you’d go to church when you got a round tuit” on the other. Always on Sundays, when the after-church groups came in, never any other day. At least with a round tuit, you knew you were getting stiffed.

Fake money would have really pissed me off, I can’t see it being a tactic of a regular customer. That’s got to be a cruel trick that one-time-only, passing-through customers use.


Years ago my mom found one of these. She didn’t open it up. Dutifully put the $20 bill in an envelope and brought to the local police department, to see if anyone would claim it. She learned the harsh truth when she checked back to see if she could keep it.


Agreed; servers have long memories, so I can’t see a regular patron doing something so petty.


Where do these things come from?


+1 for the “Chick Tract-y”. You must be old like me.


noun: fake; plural noun: fakes
a thing that is not genuine; a forgery or sham.
"the painting was a fake"
synonyms: forgery, counterfeit, copy, pirate(d) copy, sham, fraud, hoax, imitation, mock-up, dummy, reproduction; More


Eh… I thought it was funny particularly the bit about burying a dog halfway down when burying a body. This one? certainly isn’t “unethical” though so it didn’t belong.