Can I just mention I am usually on the cleanup crew, not the problem source? 
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If everything goes to plan tonight, anyone care for a free martini?
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Hah hah hah! Free martinis for nobody, hunh?
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Vent time.
I fucking fat fingered a DNS update request right now. And from dig/nslookup both google and opendns are stuck with a bad IP for a production server till the TTL expires.
I hate myself. I really, really do.
I’d say that is correct. Not only do I have the personality of a boring pretentious jackass, but I am incapable of one. Goddamn. Thing.
Will I be employed tomorrow?
You? Boring? Pretentious?!?
As was pointed out earlier, did I forget arrogant? Perhaps cringeworthy? Absolutely non-sequiter-ish?
Are you incapable of one thing because you contain multitudes?
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Sorry for bringing this down and making it about me. I’ll have the bouncer escort me to the door?
(I just, like right now, made the biggest ‘fat finger’ of my career. Ever times a thousand.)
Do you think I’m going to read back that far? And aren’t you being a tad harsh on yourself?
Hasn’t everybody fucked up monumentally at work one time or another?
Did I ever tell you about the time I failed my small animal surgery course when I lost my set of surgical instruments?
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Did I just knock N number of banks/financial companies out?
Is there a way to take advantage of this via High Frequency Trading? Could you fund your next project this way?
…
Hey, where’d my paycheck go?
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If I told you I wonder if I would be sued, arrested, shot, or all three at the same time?
(Thank FSM I don’t live in Russia, I hear polonium is awful)
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What is the smallest animal you have ever worked on?
In vitro or in vivo? Do drosophila count? Or do you mean mammals?
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Drosophila absolutely count, how do you keep your scalpel steady and what do their leg casts look like?
(I was enamored with the American Life about ants on stilts)
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Will this game hit 2000 posts while I’m asleep?
When are you sleeping?
