Grove of Plants?
Are we sure it didn’t just rip that off the druid spell list? Stopped clocks and all that.
4 Likes
It’s a fart swarm. Vulnerable to AOE fire spells.
3 Likes
I can’t help but imagine a pack of farting shambling mounds.
1 Like
Meh. This is different from fireball how? Maybe stinking cloud?
3 Likes
Farming would be a hella useful spell. Maybe not in the typical D&D game, but…
6 Likes
Moss Healing Word
Does the word get rid of the moss or grow it back?
Hold Mouse
Is this a computer mouse or a mouse mouse? Or is it the hair product but misspelled?
Heat on Farm
Real farmers are impervious
True Steake
Count to five, flip, count to five, serve.
Fomend’s Beating Sphere
When a circle jerk is just too two-dimensional
Purping Lightsin
That’s a nickname for something.
Mind Blark
Has been used against me a time or three.
Stone Share
Used by David against Goliath.
Grove of Plants
See also: Farming
Conjure Velemert
HE WHO SHALL NOT BE NAMED
End Wall
Used by Reagan against Gorbachev
Mous of Farts
Mous = Mouse Of Unusual Size. Farts = what it does
Cursing
Well, duh
Gland Growth
Promised by spammers, never delivered
3 Likes
Mous uses fart. It’s super effective
2 Likes
“So… it’s basically a fat golden retriever”
“Yes”
“Brilliant!”
7 Likes
My favourite D&D Spell was in Dragon or Dungeon magazine.
Detect Fire
Range: Touch
10 Likes
It’s too narrow to learn as a spell, you should put it on a scroll.
If you don’t have the ability to detect fire at touch range without a spell, you’re fired.
2 Likes
Fun fact about that one - it was created by a little girl who wrote the spell description in crayon and mailed it to Gary Gygax back in the day.
4 Likes
Barking Sphere
Is what you get when you ask a physicist to imagine a dog.
True Steake
Cook target object medium-rare.
End Wall
Cut a swath straight through that annoying maze. Beware of load-bearing walls, though.
Heat on Farm
Sounds like a spell from Card Wars.
2 Likes
Could be used to generate filk band names…
1 Like
Heat on Farm sounds like the follow-up episode to Card Wars.
1 Like
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