Five things you should never do when eating in Japan

I carry my own just because I don’t like the cheap splintery raw wood ones. I have some very beautiful ones that are a pleasure to use; a few dozen at home and a set in my office desk drawer, another set in the car…

The above paragraph makes it sound like I use chopsticks a lot more than I actually do. I probably only use them about once a week, really.

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Might be worth it just to see somebody eating one with chopsticks.

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Attending moderately posh meeting ostensibly to ‘open’ science collaboration with China and Japan. Looked around the table and every ‘gweilo’ was using chopsticks while every Asian person was using a fork. I inquired of a Chinese chemist of my long association, and he allowed (talking through bites of food, by the way): “eh, forks are more efficient”

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is it correct to put the chopsticks into the mouth then close the lips around them as you remove them?

Probably no worse than some attempts I’ve seen involving super-sized Futomaki.

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I prefer cheap wooden chopsticks. They make it easier to pick up the food – fancy enameled sticks have no grip to them. And don’t get me started on the round ones!

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I get that you probably don’t want to insult local people on a trip to a foreign place… And talking with your mouth full isn’t a good look in any situation… But how much of this can be chalked up to some very silly superstitions that we’d be better off leaving in the past? You also shouldn’t eat your salad with a dinner fork, but if someone gets upset that you don’t know any better– they’re the asshole, not you. I don’t know… probably better to just not offend anyone unnecessarily– especially if they’re religious beliefs that don’t hurt anyone… In any case, it’s fun to do as the Romans do, especially if it means you’re learning about other cultures in the process.

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I have to say, every you write is made funnier by your avatar

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That’s also why you don’t rub the splinters from them. I was just cleaning mine once and they went off.

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Oh, but the round Thai chopsticks with carved and inlaid handles are the most beautiful (and they aren’t short like the Japanese square-hafted ones).

another thing the Japanese never do is to put chopsticks in their hair (to hold them up etc)
I knew a French girl that did this, when I lived in Japan and all the Japanese girls that lived in the gaijin house with us pointed out that it is something that is not done.

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Presumably this refers to situations when dining out, but one of the more subtle behaviours is when eating as a guest in someone’s house one should never completely finish their meal, rather to leave a little bit behind. Otherwise the implication is that your host didn’t give you enough. So your behaviour of eating almost all of the meal and leaving a little behind is that it was so good that you ate it all but now you are so full you can’t possibly eat anymore.

All those levels of politeness. On the other hand, it is perfectly ok to hack up an oyster on the street right beside other people, or (mostly for drunken sarariman - to pee openly in a public place - against the wall etc.) But heaven forbid if you as a foreigner put your foot on a park bench to tie your shoelaces, that is considered disgusting.

Also if you give someone chocolates don’t expect them to open them up immediately and share them - they would never be so crass as to open a gift in front of the giver.

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@Papasan

Papsan is proud of his ‘tar!

He’s ‘tar-proud!

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I think this is an important point. Those things are dressed up as warnings, but to a large degree they are instructions for real or imagined travellers who enjoy the game.

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So you’re going to give me disposable wooden chopsticks and then get offended when I rub them together?!

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I thought in Japan giving guests guaranteed pristine disposable ones was considered good form.

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Quoting from the video I finally got around to watching, “High quality disposable chopsticks do not produce splinters even when broken in two. So by doing this, you are implying that the chopsticks are cheap”.

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I got that. In the West even good disposable utensils tend to be considered an inferior substitute when you are serving guests and that’s how I understood @clifford’s comment. It is my understanding that that isn’t really the case in Japan.

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Or just avoid those establishments. Because if the chopsticks are cheap, so is the fish.

Seriously. How far we’ve fallen.

First check if you’re John Steed. If so, proceed.

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I’m still wondering about the part of passing bone bits around with chopsticks at the crematorium.

I have absolutely no idea of how they do it here: tongs, spatula, shop-vac… Is that part of the funeral service in Japan?