Florida set to delete Hampton, a town with a questing, rent-seeking, corrupt wang


#1

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#2

This town sounds like something that exists solely to provide the set-up for a "Swamp Thing" comic.


#3

It's Flordia for cryin out loud. Whaddya expect?


#4

Can't they just delete Florida?


#5

Nah, it's just another little dry-lake town. I used to drive a truck route from Gainesville out around Interlachen and back through Keystone Heights in the 90's, but would sometimes have to make an extra trip towards Hampton or Waldo.

I think the kind of territory you're thinking of would be Homossassa. My brother did a route out that way for the same company. Lots of swampy land, twisty, turny roads (due to all the little inlets), and people who don't want to be found out there.

Still, there's a few areas around rural Florida where there' not really much revenue except to catch speeders going from one town to another. Hampton's one, but there's a few places on 301 South down past Gainesville, too, on the way to Orlando.


#6

Yeah, I grew up in Northeast Florida ... the Leg has had occasion in the past to abolish those municipalities who reached out to tap the wallets of tourists headed South. After all, their money belongs to the tourist industry, not to the towns the folks drive through.


#7

It's a shame. There's just no room for the hard-working small-time corrupt boss these days.


#8

It's like Nigeria, not so much a government with corruption as a criminal enterprise masquerading as a government


#9

Puts me in mind of Mack's Creek, Missouri, a speed trap town that was sunk after Missouri passed a law capping the amount of revenue towns were allowed to take in from speeding tickets. Much like Hampton, it subsequently turned out the whole city government was corrupt. The town voted to unincorporate itself in 2012.


#10

What the hell is a "diseased, questing wang"? I wouldn't dare google it.


#11

They've given the town 30 days to clean up its sleaze or they're going to dissolve it.

Sadly, the linked article didn't describe plans to empty vats of sulfuric acid in the streets as in the images evoked by that sentence.


#12

Hampton. Hampton Wick. Is this a joke?


#13

"diseased, questing wang that it has protruded from its main mass"

Sounds like this town could make billions as a tourist attraction. Paris has its Eiffel Tower, but a cthulhu-style humongous wang that protrudes from a city would surely generate more cash.


#14

Never.

Florida is a great rodent trap, draining undesirables from the major cities on the East Coast.

The Arizona of the East.


#15

No wonder my memories of Summering in the Hampton are so bad.


#16

Actually, when we were living in Georgia, Florida helped keep me sane. We often had to venture there (or South Carolina) whenever we wanted to do something dangerously unusual like see a film that was even slightly out of the mainstream (like Moonrise Kingdom, or Bernie), or see a band we'd heard of.


#17

Their entire raison d'ètre is the unwariness of people driving by and with Google self-driving navigation and speed control they will cease to exist.


#18

There is (was) also New Rome, Ohio.


#19

Yeah the fact that there is no state income tax thanks to what those tourists are charged in taxes has no benefit at all to every single person living in the state. None at all. Lets all fleece them a bit more by setting up speed traps in every shit town with 100 people in it.


#20

Waldo which is right down the road from Hampton is even worse there speed traps are so bad they sell t-shirts that say dont speed in Waldo. The entire part of inner Florida is terrible.