Great moments in space history: farting on the moon


Bowel Control to Major Tom
Bowel Control to Major Tom
Take your Beano now and put your helmet on
Bowel Control to Major Tom (ten, nine, eight, seven, six)
Commander sniffs, the side-eye’s on (five, four, three)
Check your suit seals and may God’s love be… P.U.! (two, one, liftoff)
This is Ground Control to Major Tom
You’ve really shit the bed
And the papers want to know whose shorts you wear
Now it’s time to leave the men’s head if you dare
"This is Major Tom to Ground Control
I’m exiting the stall
And I’m farting in a most peculiar way
And my crewmates’ faces look aghast today
For here
Am I sitting in my own filth
Far above the world
My suit’s filled with poo
And there’s nothing I can do
Though I’ve gassed one hundred thousand miles
I’m feeling very ill
And I think my faeces knows which way to go
Tell my wife it smells like shit up here." She knows!
Bowel Control to Major Tom
Your filter’s dead, it smells all wrong
Can you hear me, Major Tom?
Can you hear me, Major Tom?
Can you hear me, Major Tom?
Can you…
“Here am I floating in a brown haze
Farting to the moon
My undershorts are brown
And my suit is falling down…”

Okay, I’m sorry for that.




I hope my wind don’t break…?


Ken Mattingly. Not that remote.

Apollo was a little more loosey goosey back then about diet and whatnot. They were all basically still hotshot military test pilots, the customary breakfast before launch was steak and eggs. These days, sure, we have a much greater understanding of thinking long-term, but back then, shit. Al Shepard brought a golf club to the moon. We didn’t get any real scientist up there until Apollo 17.


I want to give this all the likes.


That song stinks so much it went back it time and David Bowie died of sheer embarassment.


That’s one small step for a man, one giant *BRRRRRRRP!!* for mankind.

Guys, I am so sorry.

Houston, keep the mics hot, let’s do that one again. Lander descent, take 6.

1 Like

Oh my god.

I am not worthy.

I’m gonna learn that song and play it at my daughter’s wedding.


NEVER apologize for that! It was perfect.


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