Heathrow airport declares war on Alyssa Milano's freshly-pumped breast milk


This is the dumbest goddamned rule.


But, but, but… that could be terrorist boob-milk!!!


I’ll take my chances with any TATP someone wants to mix on the plane without causing notice.


Lacto-terrorism rears its ugly head!

1 Like

It boggles the mind that this rule is still in place. Terrorists can take as many 100ml bottles of whatever liquid they like through as can fit in an 8"x8" (quart size) bag, and if two terrorists are travelling together, they can carry up to two quarts of liquid. If there are four or five terrorists on a flight, they could have as much as a gallon or even an imperial gallon of whatever. Heck, they don’t even need to be on the same flight, they just need to hand it off in the bathroom or whatever. 10 lbs of liquids (more or less, depending on the liquid) and they just have to put it all in 3.5 oz containers to get it through. I guess we’re supposed to think the extra labor or the math with dissuade them.

And clearly Heathrow doesn’t understand the hassles of pumping, which though I haven’t experienced directly, I can tell you should be done on a regular schedule lest things become painful for the woman, cause leaking, or interfere with her production, and then there’s that problem of not having milk to feed your baby.


To top it all off, the rule is based on an ill-conceived bombing attempt to begin with. All of this reactive security theater does nothing. One idiot tries to blow up a plane with a bomb in his shoes and suddenly we’re all taking our shoes off, as if it was a credible threat or anyone would try it again. I’m just glad they’re not making us all remove our underwear.


I wonder if we’re going to see Alyssa Milano’s milk show up on eBay?

1 Like


Yes. Exactly. Thanks for proving my point about terrorist boobs.

That bra is never making it past the old school metal detector though.

You ever see what happens at a choke point like an airport screening area when it gets overrun by fembots?

1 Like

(The video herein is deemed appropriate to the topic; but NSFW. Please be advised.)

I’m pretty sure that the pros in defense contracting call splitting your explosives into lots of little containers “submunitions” and charge extra for the feature…


This was just before they instigated Nuclear Armageddon requiring her to show 2 forms of valid ID.

When asked why they were being so dramatic, they said: “hey, we didn’t make the clickbate insanely over reactionary title to a total non story that you clicked on. all we did was take away some liquid because of a rule we’ve been enforcing for years now. In fact we’ve done the exact same thing numerous times every day. Not even sure why you clicked on that non-story. ho hum…ZZzzzzzzz.” They weren’t available for further comment because they were bored to sleep.

1 Like

That the rule has been enforced for years does not make it one whit less ridiculous.

I can’t speak for anyone else, but:

  • it was about some one I’d heard of, which makes it innately more interesting to me than one about someone I haven’t;

  • it concerned breast milk, which engaged me on both sophomoric (“heh, bewbs!”) and empathetic (“aw, hungry baby!”) levels.


Enforcing a well known rule, regardless of what one thinks of that rule, is hardly DECLARING WAR! :slight_smile:

This is as non-newsworthy as the police asking a famous person to cross at the crosswalk or not litter, and that question was from the fictions tsa agent who i fake interviewed about how ridiculous the title of the story was. I obviously know that people clicked on it because people will click on anything. I clicked on it to see who actually clicked through out of morbid curiosity.

I agree the rule is stupid, but it is just one of many many ridiculous rules around airport security theater, it isn’t new, it isn’t news, it isn’t remotely surprising. Am I for changing the rules? sure. Am I surprised that this rule was enforced? nope, not one iota. Am I outraged that a rich and famous person didn’t get a free pass to break the rules we all have to observe? hardly…

This happens to tons of new moms all the time. Just because she is famous doesn’t mean she gets any free pass on the stupid rules we all have to put up with as long as they are in place. It doesn’t mean they declared war on her or singled her out, if anything they applied the same rule to her as everyone else and didn’t give her special treatment because she was rich or famous. The baby wasn’t with her, so she should have known to split up the milk before going through screening, like everyone else has to, or put it in her checked bag.

This topic was automatically closed after 5 days. New replies are no longer allowed.