Latte artist takes it to the next colorful level


Originally published at:


I may need some ethereal nymph to enter my life and explain to me the magic that surrounds latte artists.

Until then, the lady at Subway … she drizzles the mayo on my sub with a certain stylistic flair as well, but her self-aware smugness is dialed in very low.


I wouldn’t want to drink one!


I happen to like the

which is what makes it “latte art” and accessible to everyone.

There is pride in being the best at an art while staying within the restrictions of the format. “Performance enhancers” either cheapen the product (think sheet cakes with photos transferred onto the icing) or make it inauthentic (think sand castles “doped” with clay).
Besides, I’d prefer to drink my latte when it’s still hot.


Was it not the late, great Beaudelaire who once said, and I quote:





How hard would it be to make a latte printer? (With lots of DRM so that people couldn’t use just any old food dye.)


I think I’d rather have a hot cup of coffee.


At some point “latte art” becomes pointless. This is that point. Hopefully it doesn’t create the same trend that happened with fancy cakes - all anyone cares about is the colored covering for the comestible, not the actual food item itself, which ends up tasting like shit.


I would stick with the palette of browns. I do not want blue and green coffee.


It really is amazing how hard it is to buy a good cake, and how easy it is to make one.

Last year a friend had a birthday cake from Stop and Shop. Vastly better quality cake (though less pretty of course) than I had at my wedding, despite costing about 1/50th as much.


The current emphasis on cake-as-sculpture means that the cake itself is just structural support for decorative fondant. That really hurts edibility. (Though my distaste for bakery cakes dates back to when it was near impossible to find anything other than the varieties that were half Crisco-and-sugar frosting.)


Kind of pointless once you’ve piped aerosol whipped cream on top. I mean… art is fine, but whipped cream.


There are parts of Italy where you’d get shot for this, and rightly so.


This used to be kind of a joke on years ago (though it was done with photo manipulation instead of actually in the coffee).

His skill is undeniable, but some of the creations at his website look like they wouldn’t taste very good.


Where’d she get the Bantha milk from?


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