Lord Of The Rings: Gollum devs apologize for everything

Originally published at: Lord Of The Rings: Gollum devs apologize for everything | Boing Boing

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“We hates stupid Deves!”

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Nowadays a marketing-approved apology from game developers seems to be as necessary as a multi-gigabyte Day 1 patch.

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“why even make a game about Gollum”

Come on, it’s a “sneaker” game that caters to folks like myself who love to play rogues or spies. :man_shrugging:

As for quality of gameplay, I can’t speak on that subject because I only devote time and resources to one game only, and this isn’t the one.

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Mtv Mtc GIF by MTV’s Lindsay Lohan’s Beach Club

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You wanted a fantasy game setting with a character that is too weak for proper combat and has to sneak about poisoning people, stabbing them in the back, pushing them down mine shafts and is also slimy and completely unlikeable?

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Notpology 101: always say “we apologize for any ______ this may have caused”

  1. Never say “that we caused” because we take responsibility for nothing.
  2. Always use weasel words like “any” to avoid actually acknowledging the nature of the harm we caused.
  3. Don’t demonstrate empathy by stating how our wrongs specifically affected our victims. Use vague language like “the game did not meet expectations”.
  4. Make no commitments to avoid the same mistakes in the future.
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That’s some good DLC. You’d think “say mY pReCiOuS” would be so fundamental to the experience of being Gollum that it would be mapped to the bottom-center face button, but nope. Three bucks.

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because I only devote time and resources to one game only

Like, one game only ever? It must be a really good game. Or do you mean one game at a time?

In my case, I’ll only buy big expensive games a few years later after they go on sale.

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I do too, but it doesn’t help all that much. I have Fallout installed, still haven’t finished it (note lack of numbers)

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ive finished that one a few times back in the day. a rarity for me, but i liked that there are different paths through to the end

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image

Oops! Meant for this one to be in the Happy Mutants food and drink topic.

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The thing is, I originally bought it back in the day. I still have the original disk and manual. The installed copy is from GoG, since that was a lot easier than digging out the disks and finding patches.

ETA: See also Deus Ex, Baldur’s Gate, Pharaoh

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Deus Ex, what a cool game. I carefully KOd all the insurgents at the Statue of Liberty, and still go called out later by an NPC for killing everyone. I still can’t decide if this was a bug, or if the game was telling me I’d been lied to about the lethality of the dart gun. :heart_eyes: Also, finding out that it is, apparently, possible, though difficult, to save Paul Denton in the tenement. :astonished:

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So do we get an apology from BoingBoing for posting a Twitter link instead of just giving us this image directly?

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And all the bugs has hopefully been fixed.

I’ve recently bought Doom 3, Prodeus, and Bolter; however I do have 1,789.1hrs logged on ARMA3; so that might count as only ever playing one game. :smile::smile::smile:

one game to rule them all, and in the darkness bind^h^h^h bundle them.

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One game. The MMORPG Dungeons & Dragons Online. I would have also joined Lord of the Rings Online, but no — I’m a slow player who likes to sniff the flowers and I don’t want gaming to dominate my time.

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