Man fired for farting too much?

You can be deaf as an EOD technician but tune a piano beautifully as long as you have a machine like this:

Or hell, even a tool specifically made for the job!

Pianos are no different from any other musical instrument. You tune to an established frequency on each string, and if you’ve got a device with perfect pitch, you don’t even need ears.

4 Likes

That thing is some industrial-level overkill. I mean, I like signal generators as much as…well @shaddack

But this would do, if you learned the tool and got your own processes right:

(I know because I have one…)

ETA - NO FAIR YOU EDITED! :smile:

3 Likes

Not really. A lap board slung between the armrests would let her carry even more than a regular waitress, to make up for any loss of speed. (Assuming the venue itself is fully accessible, as I said before.)

2 Likes

A certain dead composer disagrees with you…

5 Likes

Dum dum dum DUMMMMMMMMM

3 Likes

Or just use an app. Hell, get an Apple one, only $1200…

That’s absurd. Is there anyone stupid enough to buy that shit?

… < sigh > Of course there is…

Apparently 7 people or 7 astroturfers have reviewed it. Egads, what a crock.

1 Like

Those guys make bank!!!
I know a guy that started as a driver for production co.s, basically just sitting around in your car all day waiting to drive someone someplace, then he had 3 cars, and guys driving for him, then he bought a honey wagon. Says it was the best investment he ever made. Just drive it somewhere and let it sit there for days/weeks/months, earning you money, pay other people to service it, empty it. He stays at home with his kids in the fancy new house poop bought for him. :smile:

2 Likes

My septic guy quipped, “Your shit’s our bread and butter.”

3 Likes

Reminds me of this infamous (well, in the orchestral world anyway) incident in the Kansas City Symphony:

It has come to my attention that on November 23, 1993 in the Midland pit
during a Nutcracker rehearsal you farted loudly, creating an overpowering smell.
Subsequently, you were asked by Nan Funkhouser not to do so again. Instead of apologizing for your behavior, you then engaged in confrontative conversation with her which disrupted the rehearsal.
Your behavior is totally unacceptable and a violation of the work rules of
The Kansas City Symphony.

Made a bit of a kerfuffle because in order to play a wind or brass instrument, you have to push some with the gut, which is not exactly conducive to holding in farts. At the same time, everyone is working in very close quarters and everyone has to be able to breathe.

1 Like

Funkhauser… Stinkin badgers… This is wrong on so many levels.

3 Likes

The couple actually lives in Levittown, PA but happen to work in Trenton. And I have toured the Case factory. It stinks plenty with or without someone farting uncontrollably.

1 Like

it’s funny because normally when I fart I end up on fire too much.

There is also Devrom (bismuth subgallate) which works quite well and it is given to people who have had bariatric surgery. It binds to sulfur so while it doesn’t prevent gas, it does prevent it from smelling.

He was creating a hostile work environment :stuck_out_tongue:

This topic was automatically closed after 5 days. New replies are no longer allowed.