Man insists he is a dog, responds to "Boomer"


It sounds like Gary Matthews, 48, has lots of fun wandering Pittsburgh, barking at cars and digging holes.

It sounds fun at first until you realize that if you become a dog then you can no longer eat chocolate.


Yes, Pittsburgh is fucking strange. Yes, I’ve lived here for 22 years.

Are species changes covered under the ACA? Gold plans maybe?

Somehow, bizarrely but inevitably, the internet will spin this into evidence that anyone who likes depictions of anthropomorphic animals is a disgusting freak.

My dog eats pizza too…so maybe he is a dog.

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Are we sure this isn’t just tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE?

Matthew has never dated and has no interest in marriage or children. “I have good friends and I substitute friendship for anything closer than that,” he said.



If he isn’t a happy mutant, who is?

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I respond to “Cat”, among other nicknames; why shouldn’t he respond to “Boomer” if he likes it?

“Absolute is the right of any man to spell his name ‘Jones’ and have it pronounced ‘Smith’.”

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