Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/12/03/my-magic-8-ball-is-always.html
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I find it’s best to get truly shit-faced prior to making a bad decision.
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Sure, what could go wrong then?
*shakes 8-ball
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There’s your trouble right there. To get shit faced you have to snort the 8-ball, not shake it. 
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*8-ball instructions unclear; lying in emergency room.
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me: “Magic 8 Ball, you don’t ever lie to me for evil purposes do you?”
8ball: “magic has a price dearie…”
me: drops ball “what the fuck was that? the floaty dice doesn’t even have a side that says that!”
shouldn’t have bought the used one from the old lady on the street corner, i knew something wasn’t right…
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I’d upgrade to a Magic 9 ball.
It’s time.
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If you think yours has sass, try the Jewish version.
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There’s your problem: Not following the rules.
According to Wikipedia:
Although many users shake the ball before turning it upright, the instructions warn against doing so to avoid white bubbles, which interfere with the performance of the ball itself.
Are you seeing white bubbles? Perhaps you should see a doctor…Oh wait, you already are in the Emergency Room, aren’t you? I’m losing my place in this topic…
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@jlw maybe you need a Sarcastic Ball?
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Maybe you need a sarcastic ball?
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I have a teenager in the house and that is enough really.
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My condolences. 
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All the reviews say it costs too much and is a disappointment to its parents. 
1 Like
Spray have something to say about this…
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