Not me man. The think I love most about visual artists, musicians, actors, comedians, heck just people in general, is when they are unique. Maybe it’s cuz I came of age in the early 90s -a time when Daniel Johnston was signed onto Atlantic records for a minute. But yeah I get the conformity thing. Maybe is about ease and safety. It’s much easier to conform to a predetermined norm than come up with new ideas and be unique.
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This is ridiculous. You can’t judge the beauty of a tarantula against other spiders, that’s apples and oranges. They each need to be considered within their own families.
And of course they are all beautiful in their own way.
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Pft, the bigger they get I just pretend it’s an 8-legged cat.
Would a hat help?
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Nope. But, this might:
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I wasn’t expecting it to be blue.
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A portion of this critter bears a striking resemblance to the typewriter in Naked Lunch.
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Oh yeah:
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We had a gorgeous metallic green jumping spider that lived in our kitchen for a few weeks. Until mom saw him and kicked him outside. We don’t kill spiders.
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Or dance while singing in harmony with its two brothers, like THIS? Ha! Thot not:
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Not only that, but most blue in nature is not a result of a blue pigment, such as that described in your post (presumably because of the complexities described). Rather, most blues in nature are structural colorations. It’s the microscopic physical shape of the substance that gives them their color, not a pigment.
Human blue eyes, for example, have no pigmentation, but the way the fibers scatter the light results in the Tyndall effect, where the backscattered light tends to be of the shorter blue wavelength, which is very similar to why the sky is blue.
That spider’s blue looks to be iridescent, which is similarly structural and typically caused by multiple thin films stacked on top of each other, reflecting back light slightly out of phase, setting up an interference pattern that subtracts out all the other colors, leaving a single color such as blue.
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once I was on a school trip with my science class and I got bit by one of these things.
It turned me into the most beautiful human being in the world.
This was the beginning of all of my problems. At first I thought I would go on the Dating Game, get some money for a fancy date somewhere and then by the girl some hotdogs cause I was beautiful enough she wouldn’t mind. I was on a Dating Game with Brad Pitt and George Clooney, the girl chose Clooney because she couldn’t see me and thought I sounded like a dweeb.
Of course when she saw me she cried and said she made a mistake, small comfort.
Later on I went to the producer and asked for some money for my time but he just laughed and gave me 25 bucks and told me to get lost. As I was walking dejectedly away some guy robbed the producer’s office. As he ran by me he gave me his number and said you are one hot studmuffin! Please call me maybe.
The producer said why didn’t you stop him, if you’d kissed him he’d probably have fainted dead away!! I said get lost, the producer said I’d be mad at you but you’re just too darn cute.
Then I went outside and learned about dramatic irony. The guy I’d let get away had shot my uncle and stolen his bitching Trans Am, told him I gotta have this car, I’m hoping to have a hot date tonight with this total studmuffin I just met!
I knelt beside my uncle and heard his dying words: God but you’re turned into one hot little item haven’t you. Is my pecker hard? I love you, it’s hard because I love you.
I cried, and a big muscular cop tried to comfort me by pressing my head against his chest and saying Aw yeah, just let it all out you sweet thing you. It was pretty gross cause he smelled of dried gym sweat that had been covered up by Old Spice.
Since that day just about everyone I meet tries to get it on with me. It’s awful. I mean really I can’t even walk down the street and maybe do a little dance because I like some music I’m listening to without all the women I walk by just staring at me like a piece of meat!
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I won’t kill them, but anything over an inch across gets thrown out the window.
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“Natalie, look at this thing. We’ve got nature on the run. Finally!” ~ Adrian Monk [Monk, “Mr. Monk on Wheels” (season 7)]
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I see your square tomato and raise you a medical procedure.
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There was a reason he wasn’t included in Into The Spider-verse
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High Five Spider
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Get comfortable with the spiders, and you’ll deal with fewer other things. Pro tip: brown recluses like to eat centipedes, and house spiders, interestingly, eat brown recluses.
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Oh, I don’t mind them so much, I just don’t really like them when they’re big enough to ambush me. Big surprise spiders are not cool! I did like finding out that the weird red and white translucent ones in my last house had fangs strong enough to punch through woodlice; kinda have to respect that.
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Whenever I see that spider I always get Alice DJ’s Better Off Alone stuck in my head.
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