Raccoons may not be rabid, just drunk


#1

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/11/15/raccoons-may-not-be-rabid-jus.html


#2

There’s a reason they are my spirit animal.


#3

But were they drunk as a skunk?


#4

image


#5

Raccoon-Playing-With-Water-Sprinkler

(Because I’ve seen drunk humans do this too.)


#6

Some years back, I read about elephants getting drunk on windfall apples. Animals may be smarter than we think.


#7

“National Geographic said in its own 2015 article that research found that animals definitely did get drunk, and listed such examples as butterflies, moths and moose.”

Moose cannot hold their liquor and are much more dangerous than moths or butterflies when drunk.


#8

You know shit has gotten crazy when even the wild animals start getting drunk in order to cope.


#9

Elks can get drunk eating apples in the autumn. They can get pretty aggressive too. People can end up under siege with an elk in the garden not letting them get out.


#10

For your safety’s sake, it’s still a good idea to consider any raccoon spotted during daytime to be potentially infected. These are nocturnal animals and being out during the day is a sign something is wrong.


#11

Good story


#12

Yesh they can! An’ they’ll fight ya over that!


#13

I’m secretly hoping the German population of raccoons makes it here, they’re so cute. I mean, I’d be sick of them after the first time they ransack a trashcan, but still, so cute.


#14

I have one that likes to watch TV from the outside through a slider window from time to time. Let me know where to FedEx to you it when you get a chance. :slight_smile:


#15

Raccoons may not be rabid, just drunk

IT ME.


#16

Importing a wild raccoon is illegal here. They’re considered an invasive species, more or less.


#17

Always! They’re like a biker gang here in Parkdale. They wander through, not giving a shit (except for those the ones they deposit on my kitchen skylight window - thank you very much), knock shit over, drag their garbage to our pond to wash it, hang out smoking Belvederes (no shit, they do that) and just generally being their usual fuck you drunken bastards. I’m just glad they don’t bring a boombox and play shitty music really loud.

We already have neighbours who do that.


#18

A moose is asleep. He is dreaming of moose drinks.
A goose is asleep. He is dreaming of goose drinks.
That’s well and good when a moose dreams of moose juice.
And nothing goes wrong when a goose dreams of goose juice.
But it isn’t too good when a moose and a goose
Start dreaming they’re drinking the other one’s juice.
Moose juice, not goose juice, is juice for a moose.
And goose juice, not moose juice, is juice for a goose.
So, when goose gets a mouthful of juices of mooses
And moose gets a mouthful of juices of gooses
They always fall out of their beds screaming screams
So, I’m warning you, now! Never drink in your dreams.

Dr. Seuss’s Sleep Book


#19

Why not both?


#20

My first thought after reading the headline was, “If I see foam around the mouth, I’m not gonna waste time wondering if it came from a beer.”