Rock your way to crushed garlic

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/01/04/rock-your-way-to-crushed-garli-2.html

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I nearly bought a garlic press for myself for Christmas.

I’m glad now I waited.

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Don’t crush, slice.

How to deal with garlic.

Step 1: place a thick, disposable protective glove on your left hand.
Step 2: pick up your cricket bat in your right hand.
Step 3: pick up the garlic with your right gloved hand. Do not look directly into the garlic.
Step 4: stand on the edge of a cliff above a raging sea.
Step 5: throw the garlic into the air.
Step 6: bat the garlic as far over the sea as you can so it can never hurt anyone ever again.
Step 7: throw the contaminated glove and bat into the sea just to be safe.

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Seriously, this again?
Don’t you think you’re shilling for this garlic press just a wee bit too often? That’s the third time in less than a year…



after also promoting it in 2015:

…and of course you all also love the rubber tube:



Apparently using cold water is the trick to removing garlic smell off skin.

Yeah, it’s almost like BB is a commercial site!

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We just demand variety in our shilling :slight_smile:

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I gather you joined with that username for this purpose?

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no we don’t

^^ :vampire: ^^

I found the vampire.

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Bought this style of garlic crusher months ago. Hated it. Didn’t even use it once successfully. Did use it for “shredding” cheese for a casserole. That worked pretty well actually, but as a garlic press it was garbage.

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I despise garlic presses in general. I find my santoku knife works much better than any press, but any large knife will do.

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More cloves are not bad
Def Mark’s tool is rad
Unitaskers driving you mad
Twenty-first century Ginsu ad

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Learn to use your knife. Smash, peel and dice.

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I have this tool, the metal on the cutting side corroded and now has many small holes in it. Not BIFL sadly, and I prefer hinged presses, if you clean them right away it’s not that much work.

I’ve liked it! But I still use so much garlic I buy the jars of precut garlic.

I just crushed and diced 5 cloves of garlic with this. Smash the garlic clove with the side of the blade, dice, and scoop up with blade.

https://www.victorinox.com/global/en/Products/Cutlery/Chefs-Knives/Chinese-Chefs-Knife/p/5.4063.18
8796866379806_celum_8511_560Wx490H

If not the clever then this chef’s knife.

https://www.swissarmy.com/us/en/Products/Cutlery/Chefs-Knives/Fibrox-Pro-8-Inch-Chefs-Knife/p/5.2063.20
8815670755358_celum_90621_560Wx490H

Victorinox ROCKS!

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And I just cut my finger. Don’t forget a cutting glove.

https://www.amazon.com/Cut-Resistant-Gloves-Performance-Lightweight/dp/B00JWY1PPE

Oh, my precious garlic!

Haven’t we seen enough violence and aggression done unto it? This is just more cruel and unusual punishment.

The abuse has gotta stop now. All you need is clove.

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