Scientists find 100 million-year-old sperm preserved in amber

[pesco]

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2020/09/18/scientists-find-100-million-year-old-sperm-preserved-in-amber.html

…

[hyperpretension]

I could have guessed you would find 100 million year old sperm in Amber. Or Ashley. Definitely Ashley.

[Mankoi]

Please tell me John Hammond is using it to top a cane with.

[Otherbrother]

Wait, what kind of tree was the Amber from?

[Brainspore]

@Mankoi

Please tell me John Hammond is using it to top a cane with.

I’m not gonna look it up but I’d bet good money there’s a porn parody called Jurassic Porkin’ built around that premise.

[puzzler]

100 million-year-old sperm

Talk about a case of blue balls

[fromnabulax]

Dad, is that you?

[vector]

@pesco

The X-ray images also revealed the sperm pumps and the pair of penises that male ostracods insert into the twin gonopores of the females.

[ficuswhisperer]

@Brainspore

there’s a porn parody called Jurassic Porkin’ built around that premise

Google Image Search showed covers for:
Jurassic Porn
Jurassic Wood
Jurassic Pork
Jurassic Cock

But not Jurassic Porkin’. Better jump on that idea while you can.

[Brainspore]

I’d have guessed more porn parodies would do something with the first part of the title too. I mean it already has that “ass” built right in.

[anon55609254]

So amber is the fossilized form of Kleenex?

[ficuswhisperer]

I’m surprised there’s not more Assassin’s Creed porn parodies. It has two asses in the name!

[longtimelurker]

[ludd]

Jizzaric Park?

[rob_bray]

I bet that ostrocod’s dying thought was “Oh no mom will see it!”

[YankInNewZealand]

What 100 million year old sperm preserved in amber might look like:

[Hypoxia]

For a time-travel story, the sperm is found to contain Trumpian DNA. Yes, the world has been doomed for a very long time. And you knew they were pervos, right?

[mns]

I read it as 100 million sperm that were one year old, which didn’t seem all that newsworthy.