Star Wars ANH reissue is a travesty


I’ve been considering reviewing the Clone Wars cartoons. I had no idea they existed and my daughter, aged 7, introduced me. We now watch one together every night before she gets her bedtime reading. It kinda rules, even if the stories have Anakin and Padme and Jar Jar.

Also, I’ve been meaning to host a Star Wars Machete Order night for some friends. We plan to use the Despecialized versions of IV V VI. We need to see if Machete Order works. I think it will.


Machete Order:

Note that Episode I: The Phantom Menace is skipped entirely. In a single stroke, it eliminates a lot of the spaghetti that George Lucas threw against the wall and didn’t stick: the fact that Star Wars is all about a trade dispute, Jar Jar Binks, Jake “Spinning! I’ll try that!” Lloyd, immaculate conception, and the pod race. It also minimizes mention of midichlorians, and cuts the number of times the Empire is defatead by flying into their base and shooting at the weak spot from half the films to one-third. - See more at:



If only the Ewoks were edited out of Jedi.


We need to kickstart a ‘movie editor’ that obeys simple commands and does a seamless job, from a smartphone.

‘Siri - Remove all the ewoks’
‘Siri - replace Nic Cage with Harrison Ford’
‘Siri - just … fix this mess please’

We can’t really be too far off, technologically.


Replace the Ewoks with Mogwai and give us a far better Star Wars universe.


We really need a new messiah of Star Wars. Start again.


But then we’d miss out on 32% of @beschizza’s oeuvre.


Until it rains on Endor and they have a late-night snack.


Exactly what I am looking for. That plus Dark Force using Stripe.


Well aware of the underlying ideas there, this isn’t my first rodeo. Yes all man made works are essentially derivative, we’ve heard that song/story or seen that picture before, etc. Nonetheless stating this doesn’t actually counter or invalidate my point. Sure the first Star Wars movie can be reduced to one of the basic hero/journey archetypes but in fact we don’t value the tale as much as the telling of the tale.

Each unique rendition of a existing idea becomes a creation in its own right which we attribute to a specific “creator”. Lucas await the first to tell the story of a farm boy who goes off and has an adventure and Muddy Waters wasn’t the first to sing about how his woman done wronged him (etc) but these two are creators of their versions of existing stories. The point stands that the audience does not own the versions, we are merely responding to them. We really have no say regarding if a creator burns the manuscript/negatives/recordings/etc. The tale wasn’t destroyed after all.

Addressed above.

I didn’t want to get into this aspect of the discussion as I think it is sideline to the aspect I pointed out regarding something akin to “moral right of an author”.

Maybe some kids are davy enough to care if Han or Greedo shot first but either way its still a fun movie.

Well you can’t really say if its making money or not since it is not a uniquely available product to make a comparison against other versions. As for releasing it into PD, IANAL but I suspect that might create some complications for branding and trademark aspects which are the real money makers after all.


If you’ve got a working VCR, I’ll sell you my THX VHS releases for something more reasonable than $300. :wink: My original issue Region 1 DVDs, however, can only be pried from my hands for sums greater than even George Lucas can afford.

Han shot first!!!111!!


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