Succulent smuggler strapped 1,000 succulents and cacti to her body

Originally published at: Succulent smuggler strapped 1,000 succulents and cacti to her body | Boing Boing

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“Succulent smuggler” you say? Mmmm, juicy! (Oh! Noun not adjective! Darn!)

Still, when the customs guys got her, she soon felt the prickly heat!


" Plant smuggler strapped 1,000 succulents and cacti to her body"

And then fell down a flight of stairs? If only life were like Loony Tunes.


I had this question the other day: are all cacti succulents but not all succulents cacti?


The article seems a little backwards talking about endangered species when the obvious concern is protecting New Zealand’s unique an already heavily impacted native flora from invasive species.


Yes. Succulent is really just an idea, not a biological family: a plant that retains significant water stores in it’s leaves and stems. They are often found in arid environments, but also coastal environments where plants need fresh water preserves and also to have resistance to the desiccating effects of salt air.

A large number of Euphorbia species are not just succulents, but are also covered in spines in convergent evolution with cacti.


Better than smuggling exotic animals but still a jerky move.

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New Zealand has specific legislation covering trafficking in endangered species.

Aloa, Aloe, Aloe what goin’ on here then? Rover’s ears have been pricked by another Chinese contraband cacti criminal.


Wow, 1,000 strapped to her body? My building was throwing out all the succulents from the not-so-living wall. I rescued a couple dozen and can barely keep them alive under a grow light. Seattle is not the arid place they prefer.


transcript from the interrogation:
“… oh ho ouch… ha…ha… owee owee… sthhh… ouch… innngy ouch… that’s the spot… ouch!”


Hmmm, I mean, endangered species traded to eat for dick medicine seems stupid, but succulent plants that are endangered for…domestic propagation? Seems like a win for the DNA of that particular species. Granted, Australia and NZ are hypersensitive to any exotic flora or fauna coming in, but damn, it’s not like she had kiwi eating snakes strapped to her.
Damn. Hmmm. Fuck. Poor mule. Fuck.

You can trade in endangered species? Do you just get book value?

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