If I’m not mistaken, the title of this post suggests signing along to a song that includes the word in question. Ta-Nehisi and others here seem to expand that to just using it in general. My take is that singing along with the words as the artist performs them is just staying with the art. I don’t feel weird about it just like I don’t feel weird about singing along when the song, written and/or sung by a woman, talks about her man, etc.
When I’m reading a book that contains that phrase, I’ll read along with it. If I want to quote a passage later than contains this phrase, I’ll stay with what the author intended.
Now, using it in day to day speech, that’s a different thing. I agree with Akala (I guess that’s his name, I’ve never heard of him before right now) and Chris Rock. There’s a lot of bad history and blood associated with the term, and we should all rise above it and don’t continue perpetuating it.