I’m going to go with, “I’ve really been thinking about cutting back on carbs, so you know…that stuff is like the furthest thing from my mind right now.”
10 Likes
“There’s a Catostomus born every minute.”
12 Likes
Teach a wolf to meditate,
and he will become aware wolf.
23 Likes
*YOINK
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As he lay gasping, unable to breathe, my friend took his Epipen from his pocket and put it in my hand.
He must have really wanted me to have it.
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While we are finishing people off, then…
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Koi fish always swim in groups of four for safety.
If attacked, Koi’s A, B, and C will scatter immediately, leaving behind the D Koi.
26 Likes
Hear tell the President of IKEA was elected Sweden’s new prime minister!
Word on the street is that he’s already working to assemble his cabinet.
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Diner: “Waiter, is this coffee fresh? It tastes like mud!”
Waiter: “Yes sir, it was ground this morning!”
17 Likes
