The Merriam-Webster dictionary's word of the year is...

On that note (NSFW-ish language)…

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OohBurn|nullxnull

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Similarly, when addressing teachers at my kids schools, I only ever use Mr. and Ms. (if there’s a non-gendered honorific in English, I’d like to know of it). I’ve yet to have anyone complain that I didn’t use Mrs. or Miss. And I’m glad they haven’t. It’s a school, not a bar, I’m not trying to pick someone up. How does anyones marital status have anything to do with this?

At least we’re not genering every noun in English.

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I really like the emergence of “they” for individuals, although I tend to use it for gender-unspecified folks (which could be because they’re non-bianary, but could also just be because they could be male or female and I don’t know). It just feels good to be able to refer to people without imposing a gender identity when their gender is completely irrelevant.

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They are well ahead of you…

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Offended- no.

But I do hope that people will respect my gender as reflected in their pronoun usage. As a woman with a transgender history- we get enough erasure and denial of who we are. Just as non-binary people do and should have their lives respected.

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I’ve used they pronouns for a decade or so, for an honorific I use (and see most often) Mx.
Also recently liking “it” pronouns for myself.

The jury’s still out for a neutral master/mistress as far as I know, though.

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As someone deeply, stupidly in love with English[1], I am thankful for they. I recognize that fact that gender ambiguities and people of unconventional gender expression may need a pronoun, and this one fits, thank whatever capricious and ill-tempered gods determine the fate of tongues.

I’m all for ‘they’ for it fulfills two things I care for profoundly at the same time: not hurting people and respecting the sovereignty of language. Thank the heavens for that most useful and consonant of words.

[1] Not my native tongue, or the one I use to get by day-to-day, but one I have an undying affection for.

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Mattress. :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:

(Someone once jokingly suggested that the term for a non-binary participant in a marriage ceremony should be a portmanteau of “bride” and “groom”, and thus obviously would be “broom”.)

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Yeah, I know I made a joke about Peterson, but I do worry that one day I’m going to call someone “they” and that person will have had a very hard fight to have their gender recognized and will feel like I’m denying them their gender. When someone specifically tells me they’d like to be referred to by certain pronouns I can respect that, but it’s also easy to make a mistake after getting in the habit of ditching gendered pronouns.

I hope no one feels that I am denying their gender by not including a mention of it in a pronoun. If I do one day really hurt someone I hope we’ll be able to get past that together through apology and mutual understanding.

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Maybe not what you’re talking about, but when I’m writing to someone and I don’t know their gender, I don’t like to either imply or infer a gender for them.

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I was hoping it was “yeet”

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Holy crap. I know that word only as a thing to say when making hard jumps in I Wanna Be the Guy fan games. I just googled it and found out it is a part of much broader culture and I am taken aback.

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That’s what I was getting into with my use of Mr. and Ms. (instead of Miss or Mrs.). Because peoples marrage state just doesn’t matter to the conversation. Unless someones gender matters to the conversation, I find it odd that they would be upset by the use of they.

I’d like to hear more from @KathyPartdeux as that’s a POV that I don’t have and is directly impacted by this.

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Transgender people - are often called gender nonspecific pronouns to erase or denigrate them. Quite often that pronoun is"it". People go through a great deal to have their gender recognized - medically - administratively - socially - there are many, many, many ways we pay as people don’t wish to respect this. I don’t see the burden incumbent upon someone to do so.

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Exactly what I’m talking about.

As in, “I need to see a doctor this afternoon, but I don’t know whether they will want to run tests”

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Thanks for addressing my lack of understanding. I’m confused by your last sentence as I’m having trouble figuring out the right anticedents. Let me see if I can restate it as I understand it and you can correct me if I’m wrong.

I get that Transgender people are often slured by others who use pronouns like ‘it’ instead of one which matches their gender identity. Transgender people go through a lot of effort of many kinds to be recognized as the gender with which they identify. Many people don’t respect that and that hurts transgenered people.

Am I good so far? It’s the last sentence that confuses me. Who’s the someone in that sentence? Is it the transgendered person or the one ‘other’? Both are somewhat logical and somewhat confusing.

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The someone is anyone - it’s not a burdon to say she or he - or zhe - or they - if those are that person’s gender.

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To echo Kathy, it’s not a burden to ask someone what their preferred pronouns are, and to properly use them. Gender is a spectrum, and it is important to respect how people self identify.

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Outside of the absolute worst-case scenario of people using “it” or similar, there’s this very intriguing phenomenon where folks who get their undies in a wad over the singular they (“It’s ungrammatical! It has always been and is and always will be plural!”) suddenly learn to use it flawlessly when referring to a trans person with he/him or she/her pronouns because they can’t bring themselves to actually affirm that person’s gender for whatever reason but want to maintain a veneer of tolerance.

As trans people, we often are expected to grin and bear it when people fuck up our names or pronouns, and honestly, it’s sometimes better than dealing with a lot of “I’m trying, but it’s so hard for me” whenever we correct said fuck-ups.

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