The Mountain Goats have a new song about Marvel Comics with possibly the longest title ever

Originally published at:


a Cars-esque jam about Hawkeye called “My Life as a Weapon.”

Is it too late to hope for this as a song title? Cracks me up erry time:



I can definitely write a sequel! You may appreciate that every verse begins with “This looks bad.” (I wrote the song, but our other singer sings it on the album, and I had to explain this context to him. I think my exact words were “Sing like you’re falling out of a window while shooting a bow at a terrorist in an Adidas track suit and you only have one arrow left.”)


Longer then:

The Magnificent
by The One World Orchestra featuring the Massed Pipes and Drums of the Children’s Free Revolutionary Volunteer Guard


A Huge Ever-Growing Pulsating Brain That Rules The World From The Centre Of The Ultraworld (Why Is Six Scared Of Seven?)
by The Orb

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My personal favorite overly long song title is “All the Things You Could Be by Now If Sigmund Freud’s Wife Was Your Mother” from the album Charles Mingus presents Charles Mingus


Ah, long titles. Not just good for songs, but also for short stories. Some friends and I are having a polite bragging match about story titles. So far, my best effort is titled - Love in the Time of Cadavers: An Unabridged Printing of the Scrapbook of Golovakha Arkadiy Ruslanovich, Detailing the Strange Romance of Doctor Samuel Howard Delacourt and Mrs. Lenora Elizabeth Kildare



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Well, not quite as long, but

Skating Away On The Thin Ice Of The New Day by Jethro Tull off War Child
Dachshunds With Erections Can’t Climb Stairs by Mrs Ackroyd Band off Gnus And Roses
The Day That Curly Billy Shot Down Crazy Sam Mcgee by The Hollies off The Hollies
It’s A Long Way To The Top If You Want To Rock & Roll by AC/DC off T.N.T.
Everybody’s Got Something to Hide Except Me and My Monkey by The Beatles off The Beatles (White Album)
Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogeryychwyrndrobwllllantisiliogogogoch by Mrs Ackroyd Band off Oranges And Lemmings (Bonus points for the title being the chorus—spelled out! “el” “el” “ay” “en” …)
Several Species of Small Furry Animals Gathered Together in a Cave and Grooving With a Pict by Pink Floyd off Ummagumma
Kitty “Tommy, Quick! Get Up, I Can Hear Clogs Goin’ Up The Street.” Tommy “Well Stick Mine Out And See If They’ll Go With 'Em!” by Richard Thompson + Danny Thompson off Industry

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My favorite long song title is:

The Dark Liege of Chaos Is Unleashed at the Ensorcelled Shrine of A’zura-Kai (The Splendour of a Thousand Swords Gleaming Beneath the Blazon of the Hyperborean Empire, Part II) by Bal-Sagoth, from the album Battle Magic.

I think Sufjan’s “The Black Hawk War, or, How to Demolish an Entire Civilization and Still Feel Good About Yourself in the Morning, or, We Apologize for the Inconvenience but You’re Going to Have to Leave Now, or, ‘I Have Fought the Big Knives and Will Continue to Fight Them Until They Are Off Our Lands!’” has John beat by a few characters.

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