The shipwreck that covered an entire beach in bags of Doritos

boing
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Originally published at: The shipwreck that covered an entire beach in bags of Doritos | Boing Boing

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Weird, I just watched Swiss Army Man last night wherein a stray bag of “Cheese Puffs” washes up on the shore of the desert island the protagonist was stranded on. For a moment my morning brain was wondering where I’d heard this story before.

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Under maritime law the distinction is important. Flotsam may be claimed by the original owner, whereas jetsam may be claimed as property of whoever discovers it. If the jetsam is valuable, the discoverer may collect proceeds received though the sale of the salvaged objects.

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There was a summer ranger at the National Seashore there, Rany Jennette [sic], who had grown up at the Cape Hatteras Lighthouse – his father was the last keeper. He used to tell a story of a freighter that had run aground nearby and the captain decided to lighten ship by offloading some of the cargo – bananas. That family (and likely all the others on that reach of the island) ate bananas and ate bananas and ate bananas. (I imagine they had some banana bread too.) Rany said he never liked bananas after that.

I guess all he could do was Just Look At Them.

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perfect place to recover the wreckage — many houses on Hatteras are built from salvaged lumber.

Maritime law is real in the islands - the wreckers reap the spoils that wash up on their shores

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Someone needs to get Gordon Lightfoot’s attention and tell him this story ASAP.

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I’ll let him know, he was creeping around my back stairs just yesterday evening

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Seems Stan Rogers is already on the case.

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I preferred this story when it was whisky, not Doritos

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I thought he was a ghost you can’t see?

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The same thing just happened in France, but with cocaine.

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Cocaine Lobster, the sequel to Cocaine Bear.

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A bulk carrier filled with sour cream and avocados is on it’s way for the clean up operation.

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mysterious bales of drugs wash up, or are found floating just offshore here as a weekly occurrence.
so frequent, in fact, it has come to be known as “square grouper”.

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And to think marijuana was and remains illegal in NC.

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ahh! “green grouper”. not as profitable and has become scarce in our local waters. why i always bring my own.

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Not gonna lie, this would be a great day for me. I have a pretty serious Doritos weakness. I love all the flavours. I know they are trash not fit for human consumption, but the heart wants what it wants. Don’t judge me.

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you and me both. i read this article and thought two things: “Dang, i missed out on a lot of bags of free Doritos!” and “At least the Taco flavor wasn’t part of this, so the stock wasn’t depleted.” lol

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I don’t think one shipping container would have damaged the world supply. :laughing: