Originally published at: Tom the Dancing Bug - News of the Times: Another U.S. School Hit by Intercontinental Ballistic Missile - Boing Boing
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Quite over the the top as satire.
Domestic use would be MRBMs or IRBMs, tops.
Yes, /s. Bitter, bitter /s.
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Love me Tom the Dancing Bug! yet in this case, Bob the Angry Flower
((hm… never noticed the <name> the <adjective> <noun> before))
did it first:
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Even a pro-ICBM control freak like myself has to admit that Mike Williams makes a good point about leafblowers.
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Reminds me of this that I remember seeing in my local library as a kid:
Which I never got around to reading.
I’ve also just realised it’s by the same Marc Laidlaw who helped write Half Life.
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As a missile-wanker, I prefer ICBMs. There are 30-50 feral hogs that roam the streets of my suburb, and by God, we need intercontinental capability to accurately target them! I have missiles set to circumnavigate the globe before hitting the drop zone, just as George Washington intended!
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I love how Clarence Thomas has a ouija board.
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It’s not so much the missile as the warhead.
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Yeah. No real need to target the 30 to 50 feral hogs. Or count them. Just the general direction of the town will do.
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I came here to post that too. I got the ebook a while back and read part of it, but then I got distracted.
I’ve had some version of this conversation with multiple (otherwise sane) friends who feel like the 2nd amendment “obviously” covers assault rifles / bump stocks / whatever because they’re “arms.” And I’ve had some actual success.
Me: “So when the founders said ‘bear arms’ they weren’t meaning muzzle loading long guns, they meant literally any kind of weapon?”
Friend: “Yes.”
Me: “So you’re 100% okay with your mentally unstable, clumsy, forgetful neighbor with the bad temper owning a briefcase nuke. I mean, just as a collector. Or maybe as a deterrent, for home defense. You’d put your life on the line to defend his right to keep a briefcase nuke in his house?”
Friend: “Uh… well… no. Not a nuke.”
Me: “Surface to air missile?”
Friend: “No.”
Me: “Then we’re not actually in disagreement. You agree that the relative danger vs utility does matter, and that ‘arms’ shouldn’t be taken to mean literally any weapon. We just draw the line in different places as to where that acceptable risk vs reward point should land. It’s not unreasonable to discuss, as a nation, where we want to draw the line… so long as we agree that there is a line and there are weapons that exist on either side of it.”
None of them conceded the point outright, but they genuinely did seem to give it some real thought. And in the end, they acknowledged that maybe not treating ‘arms’ as an absolute was okay – we just didn’t necessarily agree on, say, which side of the line an assault rifle should land.
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Flattening a school is a wildly tone deaf analogy to make considering Biden’s Gaza policy.
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There is this segment in Bowling for Columbine where Michael Moore interviews James Nichols1) and his gun collection. The usual righttobeararmssecondamendmentfreedom blah, but when Moore asks whether that means that people can have nuclear weapons, Nichols vehemently takes issue with this because “there are crazy people out there”.
1) The brother of Terry Nichols, Timothy McVeigh’s co-conspirator in the 1995 Oklahoma City bombing (168 killed, 680 injured).
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4 people are dead, just a couple counties over from me. And this is a common and regular occurrence in America lately. We can care about multiple things at once. it doesn’t have to just be the one awful thing happening, we can care about them all. I’m really sick of this attitude that we can’t discuss anything except one crisis at a time. Bullshit. We have a polycrisis and we should not ignore one issue for another.
And unlike Biden’s gaza policy, the American public have a better chance of demanding change. At the end of the day, whatever Biden does with regards to Gaza, it’s ultimately up to the Israeli public to put a stop to this war. They are the only ones who can make their government stop mass murdering Palestinian civilians in their name. Yes, Biden and congress should stop arms flowing, but Bibi will find those weapons elsewhere, until Israelis put a stop to this genocidal war. 
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USA, only country in the world where arming teachers is a solution to daily school shootings. USA only country in the world where you can buy a gun at 18 but you cannot buy a beer. USA, only country in the world where a regular dude owning an assault rifle sounds logical and reasonable.
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