Two people arrested in stolen car containing rattlesnake, gun, booze, and uranium

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2019/07/11/two-people-arrested-in-stolen.html

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Are we sure this isn’t a Coen Bros script?

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If you’re calm, that wondrous snake will be calm too.

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I mean, the hed reads like a quick round of Exquisite Corpse…

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11932160_gal

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First thought: In Florida it would have been a python and plutonium.

Next thought: Did the cops find the stolen ATM machine in the trunk?

And next: Wasn’t this an S. Clay Wilson story in Zap! comix circa 1974?

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Hmmm a rattlesnake, uranium, and a gun?

Pretty sure they were trying to mutate the snake into creating their own Serpentor.

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The Coen brothers’ remake of Repo Man?

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Glad he clarified. Could have applied to any of the above.

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TIL that there are states with a rattlesnake hunting season.

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Was coming to post “wasn’t that a GI Joe 5 episode story”???

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How, exactly, did they identify the “canister of radioactive powdered uranium”? Because I would bet that it’s an empty canister with a novelty label. The police have enough trouble identifying drugs; how the heck are they going to conclude that something is uranium?

Maybe it’s just some badly cracked Fiestaware.

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Sounds like Fallout LARPers.

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WELL ACKSHUALLY all uranium is radioactive, but you could basically eat the stuff sprinkled on your breakfast cereal and suffer no ill effects, unless you stole your canister of uranium from a nuclear power plant.

No radiological effects, I mean. It would definitely be bad for you on a chemical level. Don’t eat heavy metals, kids.

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Are we sure it is all theirs?

Wrong dang car, Maude… :slight_smile:

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My favorite part of the story is that he’s free and clear on the rattlesnake charges because he has a rattlesnake hunting license, and that apparently lets him keep a live rattlesnake in his possession at all times.

Not that I have a problem with this! You’ll pry my rattlesnake out of my cold dead hands, which should happen about half an hour after I pick up the rattlesnake.

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There was that power vacuum when Cobra Commander took a sabbatical in order to berate Objectivist protagonists

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Strangely I had almost the exact same thought, and I pictured a younger Nicolas Cage as the male half of the couple.

“I’m going to take these here huggies, this rattlesnake, this bottle of Deluxe, the radioactive powder, and all the money in your cash register.”

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Was this car named…”the United States of America”?

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Look, you can’t always wait around and hope a radioactive spider turns you into a superhero. Sometimes you have to go out and MAKE that shit HAPPEN.

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