My favorite part of the story is that he’s free and clear on the rattlesnake charges because he has a rattlesnake hunting license, and that apparently lets him keep a live rattlesnake in his possession at all times.
Not that I have a problem with this! You’ll pry my rattlesnake out of my cold dead hands, which should happen about half an hour after I pick up the rattlesnake.
This sounds like one of those training exercises where it’s like, “OK, you’re going to be in such-and-such a situation. What four things would you most need to bring with you?”
Scavenger hunt, but somehow ‘urine’ became ‘uranium’. Shit happens. A canister of powdered urine? Sure, or uric acid crystals, just as good. Uranium is just an odd bonus.