Originally published at: United Airlines' Christmas movie "Love in Plane Sight" is as awful as you'd imagine | Boing Boing
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I’ve been on many a flight where I bonded with the person sitting next to me over our shared hatred of everything about the United experience, but relationships based on shared trauma never last.
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Occasionally, I find myself recovering from a mild hangover and forced to watch a Sunday Hallmark flick. Usually I’ll survive with my lunch intact if there’s Gravol handy. I suspect this is inflicted on me in retribution for having something less romantic, like “The Fall of the House of Usher”, queued up for the weekday evenings.
“Christmas turkeys” are a staple of the industry, to be sure, but this “Plane” story, and my experience this Sunday, makes me wonder if this is an unusually awful XMas for movies.
A recurring (and IMHO plausible) theme in the IMdB reviews of the truly terrible Netflix hairball “Best. Christmas. Ever!” was speculation it written using a LLM AI. The screenwriters listed are odd: one was active from 1970 to just into the 2000’s, then pops up on this and one other film, the other seems to be an author of books for kids. How this disjointed heap of wierd, drifting text got green-lit is beyond me; it made Hallmark flicks look like Shakespeare.
I suspect Orwell’s vision of fully automated romance lit has finally made it to the screen.
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Astronomer ? Flying in First Class? Only two or three years after graduation and she’s making bank!
Is this a ‘movie’ they force you to watch before take-off?
Has to be some hoodie on the BB Shop that you can zip up over your face and retreat into your own personal environment.
Actually … I would give a shot at dressing up as a Furry and being crated in the belly of the plane…
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Well, that egghead certainly learned her lesson! Scientific research and the life of the mind will never fulfill her like the company of a handsome, kid-loving (hint-hint!) stonemason or handyman or Prince-in-disguise or whatever he is.
That’s being generous. Most of them could be written with Mad Libs.
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You can earn a ton of miles with all of the business travel to astronomical sites like Jupiter and Mars.
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Elle Towe
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You don’t like movies that get straight to the point?
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Miss-Elle-Towe. Jeez. What’s his name, Chris Maas?
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They only had six minutes. Which, to be fair, seems a more ideal length for this genre of movie.
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Speaking of time constraints, duder in the movie spilled her coffee all over her then had to rush away because his flight was, “about to board,” but shows up on the plane with a fresh gingerbread latte he had time to buy? Then he didn’t even offer it to her.
They did a good job subtly making him look like a jerk in a short amount of time.
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I’m waiting for them to make the musical version:
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I’ve been binge watching Air Disasters on the Smithsonian channel, because I never want to fly, I thought I’d seen them all.
I guess I missed one.
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dressing up as a Furry and being crated in the belly of the plane
Best flight I’ve ever been on was in the cargo section of a C141 (military cargo plane) flying back to the USA from the UK. No one tried to talk to me, the seats were very comfortable even with my 6’4" frame, and the in-flight meal was a boxed lunch hoagie with fruit and chips. Damn right I’d borrow a friend’s fursuit if I could fly cargo!
(It would be worth it just for the no flying children, or at least none that I could hear, and being left alone to read my book for the duration of the flight.)
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My wife suggested Christian Mitchell for our son’s name. I pointed out that a December baby with the nickname “Chris Mitch” might not be the best idea. She reluctantly agreed.
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right? and add to that getting coffee spilled on her. i hope she apologized! /s
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Hold up. Is this the same guy? Did he get a job at United because of this (possible) first film was shown at TikTok’s Cannes offering? 
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She didn’t, so must not be 
…
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“OK. We’ll have to base it on sex then.”
I’ve not seen a Hallmark film; but they have brought me joy via the medium of PushingUpRoses.
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That cover image with the glassy eyes looks like they both got high just to make it through filming. 
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