Watch Stretch Armstrong meet his untimely yet dramatic demise

Well, I certainly wouldn’t put it in food or anything like that.

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Pretty sure that’s not a thing. There are videos for that too.

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Mike never recovered from this childhood trauma, man. /s

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I was gonna offer up ‘who wants a tummy tickle’ but you really nailed it (ahem) with the draw and quartering!

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I had a Stretch Armstrong when I was a kid. I grew up in north central Texas. Anyway, I left Stretch in the garage one night when we had a surprisingly very cold deep freeze. I think the temperature went below zero, which was pretty rare even for that part of Texas. In the morning, I picked Stretch up by his arm and it just snapped off. That was the end of Stretch.

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I had the Stretch Monster when I was a kid. When it inevitably started leaking, I mummified it with tape and buried it in my back yard. I had a thing got mummies as a kid.

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I had one of the original Stretch Armstrong figures when I was a kid. Two friends pulled the arms and legs until the skin split and then hid the body in my closet on top of all the KISS albums my cousin gave me. The goo covered the albums, turning them into a sticky cube, and stuck them to the closet floor. More than 30 years later here is remnant goo on the floor to this day.

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There was a Stretch Armstrong in my college humor magazine’s office. It definitely tore and the goo definitely got ground into the carpet. I don’t think we ever got it out (the magazine moved to a different office a few years later).

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Yes! I bought that stuff from a carnival when I was maybe 9 or 10. In retrospect, I was high as shit by the time my mother caught on and confiscated it.

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