“Hey, I saw a rat in the courtyard - is it the owner’s lost pet?”
So, it’d be OK for the tenants’ friends to post negative reviews, eh?
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Second day in a row I got caught by the “spelling police”…
You say “defecting”, I say “defecating”, lets call the whole thing off!
Sign it “Spelling Police”!
PS. That’s the whiskey talking.
Somebody’s defected in the elevator?
The sign says it’s “Out of Odor”.
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The reviews are getting good -
This is a TWO star review.
I was not going to post, but the attention this place has gotten nationally made me realize I couldn’t stay silent ay more.
The Windmere apartment building sexually assaulted me. Tentacles grew from the wall at night and felt my buttocks. This occurred three nights in a row. Also, pixie laughter, and an eerie sense that I was continually being watched by dark forces beyond the normal universe.
The complex seems to have been built on the ancient burial ground of something called “HAS’ZAAN"HAAAU WHO MUST NOT BE NAMED.” Some sort of elder god from the ancient Sumerians. I don’t know.
I tried to complain to the management. I guess I hadn’t notice but there was a clause on my lease indemnifying them against any supernatural occurrences. “Blanche” from the rental office was so snide and rude. She said that I was lucky to have central air and a gym, and that and that Elder Gods “don’t usually bother anyone who abides by the teachings of Jesus.”
Blanche was consumed by an ice monster the summer after I left, which made it HELL trying to get my security deposit back. I don’t know who runs the office now.
Also, the parking space they gave me was like 300 yards from the lobby, and I had to go up too many stairs to get to my unit.
I am much happier at the Okochobee Arms. There is an Elder God problem here too but the management sprays regularly and I’ve only ever seen one wall tentacle.
OMMV
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