With this new app you'll never run into a broken McDonald's ice cream machine again

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2017/11/07/with-this-new-app-youll-neve.html

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“Sorry, we don’t have all the locations yet but we’re working on it and the next update will be bigger and better,”

Poisoning yourself is apparently a hot item nowadays.


Unicorn chaser


The only time I have gotten food poisoning is from a small mcd milkshake. Never again.


And people wonder how the citizens of this nation could have elected
a male septuagenarian version of Veruca Salt to the Oval Office a year ago.

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Is there an app that I can use to avoid all McDonalds?


The crushing realization of finding out a McDonald’s ice cream machine is out of service is an actual thing…

I found it entertaining to see this right after the millions of vanishing Bitcoins. I’ll bet there was some crushing realization there too.

Years ago I bought a Mickey-D’s ice cream cone and took it with me on the bus ride across campus. It was September and in the 90s (30s C) in a bus with no AC. I got caught up talking with a friend and forgot I was holding the ice cream. When I got to my stop I took a big bite into a warm spiral of unmelted foam.

Never could have any of their ice cream again.


The struggle is real, though not a big deal - for you.

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I would think that McDonald’s soft serve would be one of the only things that didn’t differ too greatly from other soft serve brands.
TL;DR…Technically, I wouldn’t really brand McDonald’s as the “soft serve bad guy”, when soft serve isn’t a super healthy option to begin with.

From the Dairy Queen FAQ section on their soft serve. However, the recipe is a trade secret:

Snopes on DQ soft serve, which includes a link at the end to a page of FDA regulations and standards on soft serve and frozen custard:

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Well someone has to run into the broken machine for it to be reported and that someone could just as well be you.

Every breathtaking new advance in the app store reminds me of this great commercial:

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