Of course not. That would be absurd. You don’t need to concede to their views to acknowledge that they’re flawed human beings grieving over a dead child.
If you find their compassion for their child lacking, why not take the opportunity to demonstrate it yourself, to them? It’s easy to empathize with those that think like you. The real test of character is how you treat those who don’t.
Ah, so I’m being intolerant of their intolerance?
You don’t have to take a position on their intolerance at all, right at this moment. You can let them grieve in peace.
Well, at least you’ve dropped your false claims that people were “disrupting” the so-called memorial service and that it was all entirely private. Funny how the facts forced you to change your tactics.
Admittedly you’re continuing to ignore the obvious: no one, and certainly no one in this thread, as far as I know, is disrupting whatever grieving Jennifer Gable’s family members are doing. As public as this forum may be the fact that they’re being criticized here isn’t harassment. They are being allowed to “grieve in peace”, although all their grief seems to be directed at who they wanted their daughter to be rather than who she was. And I get that you think that’s okay, that they should be allowed to indulge their bigotry, because calling them out on it might hurt their feelings.
How about a compromise, though? How about those who have problems with how Gable’s family treated her withhold their criticism until all the family members are dead? Once they’re dead it won’t matter how they’re treated or regarded, according to you, because they won’t be around to be bothered by it. Of course you’ll still be free to keep defending them.
Reminds me of a stupid story.
A friends mother in law was put in charge of the cake for my friends christening. The mother in law had been campaigning unsuccessfully for a name for my friends son. She still had the name put on the childs cake and my friend was scooping the letters of the cake when the guests came in.
It wasn’t that they weren’t; empathetic; it was HOW they were stating their lack of empathy. @namenotreserved is also ignorant and really doesn’t seem to give a shit about the person who died, or the people who still love her and who see her as she actually was, not how her parents wished her to be. Parents aren’t all angels and saints; some of them are selfish assholes. Being a parent shouldn’t give you free access to do whatever you want to your adult child. It was NOT up to them. Period. End of fucking discussion. The fact that @namenotreserved can’t see that is sad.
I am not making atheists look bad. He or she is.
Parents are still people. They don’t automatically deserve respect. What about ABUSIVE parents? This is abusive!
Are you really comparing THINGS – racist things – to a human being?
I think we put far too much stock in the saying, “You can pick your friends, but you can’t pick your family.”
It is possible to choose your family, and to choose not to associate with those who, even though they may be biologically related to you, have, through their actions, shown themselves to be unworthy of the love and respect normally given to family members.
There aren’t many details about Jennifer Gable’s life, but, based on how her family treated her, and the fact that she was unable to turn to them during her transition, it seems she had ended her relationship with them–or they’d ended it. Unfortunately the courts decided that, as biological next of kin, her so-called family had more rights than she or anyone she might have trusted did.
I have simply pointed out that it’s inappropriate to call people bigots at their child’s funeral.
We aren’t at a funeral, we’re in a blog post.
They’re honouring their child in the way they feel best.
Are they honouring them? Do you know that they consider what they’re doing to be honouring them?
They apparently believe they can pick their family. They wanted a son, and god dammit they were determined to remember having one.
I agree with everything you said and I really wish that @namenotreserved could understand this. What they did was disgusting.
I hope her friends correct her gravestone.
Funeral as opportunity to get the last word.
The Gable family has stuck a new little pushpin in the map of human evil and degradation.
Make a letter of instruction that goes with your will, and mark it to be opened immediately upon your decease; your lawyer can show you how this works in your state (it varies a lot). In most states a will is not opened immediately unless so instructed. Many, many, many provisions are violated every year because by the time it was opened it was too late (not just about trans people, but about things like embalming, open caskets, care of pets, notification of friends and relatives, provision for secret dependents, organ donations or refusals, preventing distrusted persons from getting their hands on things, disposition of “from the grave” confessions, erasures of hard drives, etc.) If there’s something that needs to be done the moment you’re drifting down to room temperature, a will is often too slow and too late.
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