Badass Space Dragon - Round 8 - Stonks and Stones

games
1 
Space Rangers Destroyed by Charybdian Resistance
by Newt Greenwald

We call it space but there never seems to be enough. Our perpetual hunger for resources has most recently taken us into neighboring Charybdis, a galaxy which does not desire our presence.

You will remember Charybdis as the subject of Brad Nebula's eye opening series of editorials. Nebula's experience has been very positive but not-so with the group of Space Rangers dispatched to clean up the rougher elements. Three battles took place in the early morning leaving the six rangers and one local marshal to drift the black. [..]

Battle Report ā€“ Grangerā€™s End

The battle started as a lopsided attack on the celebrity ranger, Hawk Granger. Granger was perhaps best known for his peppy aphorisms and gentlemanly bloodlust.

The "Muddlin' Through" led a precision strike against the ranger but was himself the target a manhunt. Marshal Seldon of the Ironclad Cochrane joined a posse with Ranger Slaal of the Firewind 9 and chased him into battle. Also drawn into the skirmish was Ranger Zippy on the hunt for "The Slightly More Than Ordinary." A total of four coalition ships and eight belonging to the resistance.

The two groups were closely matched but the resistance ships won the day losing only "The Slightly More Than Ordinary" and "Cepheus Maiden."

Battle Report ā€“ Adaā€™s Final Toast

Ranger Ada was set upon by three resistance ships. She was outnumbered and outgunned in a battle that lasted a scant few rounds. It was reported that the resistance ships invited Ada over for a drink before the battle. She declined.

Battle Report ā€“ Fall of McCall

Ranger Lee was hunted down by The Burnt Asbestos and NordstjƤrnan, which was being pursued by Ranger Marian McCall. The resulting battle between the four ships was evenly matched and came dangerously close to destroying all involved. The rangers had the upper hand until the NordstjƤrnan managed to strike critically and turn the tide. Even so, only the Burnt Asbestos survived to battle.
2 Likes
2
***Captain Roger Wilco - Human (Outlaw)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Aluminum Mallard 0/0 0 0 0 0 0 $0 NONE 14

**~ DEAD ~** | Destroyed by The Jewel of the Desert
***Captain Beefheart - Space Lizard (ICUP)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Bongo Fury 0/0 0 0 0 0 0 $0 NONE 7

** ~ DEAD ~ ** | Killed by Don Mondo
***Captain Q'a'strastro - Human (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Burnt Asbestos 27/124 42 43 31 22 34 $1474 Miner's Hardhat 17

You roll into battle accompaniaed by Captain Morel Lƶnnrot of the NordstjƤrnanagainst and set upon Lil' Timmy. It looks like a favorable matchup until Ranger Marian McCall shows up looking for Lƶnnrot. The tide of battle is turning against you and it seems that you'll both be sunk until Lƶnnrot squeezes off a critical strike against McCall.

You make it out alive, barely. Lƶnnrot and the others are jetsam for the scrappers.

**-$9600, +48 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$5000, +5 MAX HP** | Hull Density Adjustment
**-$25,000, +25 SH** | 5 x Plow
**-$15,000, +15 EN** | 3 x Turbo Button!
**-$3000, +2 LK** | 2 x Clover Soup
**-$500** | Mission Supplies
**-97 HP** | Battle Damage vs. Timmy & Marian
**+6 GRIT** | Ranger Takedown - Timmy & Marian
**+3 FP, +3 SH, +3 EN, +3 ST, +3 LK** | Salvage
***Captain Thrummel Carfax - Android (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Cepheus Maiden 0/0 0 0 0 0 0 $0 Electro-Fedora 11

It was an unlucky battle for you. Two other outlaw ships had been targeted and there were plenty of distractions in the battle but Hawk Granger got his hooks into you and unleashed a barrage of heavy artillery that punched through your Hull like it was made of a wet paper bag.

**+$5,100** | Endogenic Escrow Payment from Captain Falkayn
**-$4600, +26 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$500** | Mission Supplies
**-127 HP** | Battle Damage vs Granger, Slaal, Zippy, Ironclad
**~ DEAD ~** | Destroyed by Ranger Slaal
***Commander Jameson - Human (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Cobra II 133/154 47 39 34 41 50 $60274 Greasy Ball Cap 13

Sorry, a little late today!

**No Action Today** | -5 GRIT
***Captain Lenar Belox - Android (ICUP)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Das Boot 0/0 0 0 0 0 0 $0 NONE 13

**~ DEAD ~** | Destroyed by The First Post1
***Captain Rhaegar - Human (Neutral)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Dracarys 20/111 38 30 27 17 21 $20000 NONE 2

**No Action Today** | -5 GRIT
***Captain Glenn McJlarty - aka McJ - Human (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Dubdub 106/106 18 35 23 16 81 $50264 NONE 12

**No Action Today** | -5 GRIT
***Captain Newb Naiv - Human (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
First Post1 2/180 53 29 21 16 36 $14044 NONE 15

**+$1000* | Endogenic Escrow Payment from Captain Falkayn
**+$7500** | Distribution from Captain Pedge
**No Action Today** | -5 GRIT
***Captain Lord Fritz - Android (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Grey Mouser 60/100 29 34 32 27 23 $8567 NONE 13

You show up to face Hawk Granger and end up in a more even battle than you hoped. The Rangers are there in force and resistance ships are taking heavy damage. You contribute to taking out the Zippy drone and get land several well placed shots on Granger himself.

**+1 EN** | Captain's Log
**+6 HP** | Affordable Repair Act
**-$5,000, +5 SH** | Plow
**-$500** | Mission Supplies
**-40 HP** | Battle Damage vs Granger, Slaal, Zippy, Ironclad
**+2 GRIT** | Ranger Takedown vs Granger, Slaal, Zippy, Ironclad
**+4 ST, +2 EN** | Salvage
***Captain PingPing Pandan - Human (Neutral)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Hobar 0/0 0 0 0 0 0 $0 NONE 8

** ~ DEAD ~ ** | Dynamite Explosion
***Cap'n Ninedollar - Space Lizard (Neutral)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Hoosier Mama 74/104 19 17 18 19 17 $10220 NONE -14

**No Action Today** | -5 GRIT
***Skipper - Space Lizard (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
I.M.V. Flatulent Deity 168/200 41 43 34 28 57 $0 Bolero 29

An effective team, you and your friends stagger into battle and melt Ranger Ada in a few short rounds of battle. Back to the bar!

**-$12,200, +61 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$10,000, +10 SH** | 2 x Plow
**-$10,000, +10 EN** | 2 x Turbo Button!
**-$32,000, +32 MAX HP** | Hull Density Adjustment
**-$500** | Mission Supplies
**-$5,300** | Transfer to Captain Underpants**+1 LK** | Happy Crew
**-32 HP** | Battle Damage vs Ada
**+2 GRIT** | Ranger Takedown vs Ada
**+3 FP, +3 ST** | Salvage
***Captain Krazy D Clown - Human (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Insane1 64/112 41 28 30 17 41 $21240 NONE 15

Plenty of missles slamming into other ships but the battle went well for you. One real teeth rattler from Granger but after that you decided it would be best to avoid enemy fire. Sometimes the expected is most unexpected.

**-$500** | Mission Supplies
**-$10,000, +10 SH** | 2 x Plow
**-$10,000, +10 EN** | 2 x Turbo Button!
**-$10,000, +10 MAX HP** | Hull Density Adjustment
**-48 HP** | Battle Damage vs Granger, Slaal, Zippy, Ironclad
**+2 GRIT** | Ranger Takedown vs Granger, Slaal, Zippy, Ironclad
**+5 SH, +1 EN** | Salvage
***Marshal Paul Seldon - Human (ICUP - Marshal)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Ironclad Cochrane 0/0 0 0 0 0 0 $0 Chupalla 23

The Ironclad aligned with Ranger Slaal of the Firewind 9 and at Marshal Seldon's suggestion, tracked down Captain Falkayn of the Muddlin' Through.

Falkayn was in the process of leading a surprise attack against Hawk Granger so the pair of lawmakers interceeded.

Marshal Seldon put his homing missiles to use against the Muddlin' but was overwhelmed by superior numbers and eventually taken out by the resistance ship, Jewel of the Desert.

It was a hard life and a short one but Marshal Seldon took his own path... and that took GRIT.

**+39 HP** | Affordable Repair Act
**-$3000, +2 FP** | 2 x Homing Missiles
**-$3000, +2 SH** | 2 x Flak Bursts
**-$1500, +1 EN** | Glorious Gadgets, Gizmos and Gewgaws
**-$1500, +1 LK** | Clover Soup
**-$500** | Mission Supplies
**+4 GRIT** | Posse Up!
**+$1000** | Endogenic Escrow Payment from Captain Falkayn
**+$7500** | Distribution from Captain Pedge
**-121 HP** | Battle Damage vs Resistance
**+2 GRIT** | Walked His Own Path
**~ DEAD ~** | Destroyed by The Jewel of the Desert
***Captain Hogarth - Human (ICUP)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
The Iron Giant 0/0 0 0 0 0 0 $0 Plaid Kangol 17

** ~ DEAD ~** | Destroyed by G2-4311 Android
3
***Captain AdƩlie - Android (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Jewel of the Desert 92/142 41 55 31 29 57 $3700 Miner's Hard Hat 34

Part of a major battle, you took down Marshal Seldon of the Ironclad Cochrane, an old associate who had aligned himself with the Coalition Space Rangers. It was a mess of a battle but you came out relatively unscathed and pulled some decent salvage from the wreckage.

**+$1000** | Endogenic Escrow Payment from Captain Falkayn
**+$7500** | Distribution from Captain Pedge
**-$15000, +75 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$500** | Mission Supplies
**+1 EN** | Com Screen
**-47 HP** | Battle Damage vs Granger, Slaal, Zippy, Ironclad
**+2 GRIT** | Ranger Takedown vs Granger, Slaal, Zippy, Ironclad
**+3 FP, +3 EN, +1 LK** | Salvage
***Captain Increase Waistline - Human (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Mistaker II 19/100 18 19 18 16 39 $2500 NONE 7

No one knows how you made it through that mess. You might make it through the week if you drive with your eyes open.

**+$2000** | Endogenic Escrow Payment from Captain Falkayn
**-$500** | Mission Supplies
**-36 HP** | Battle Damage vs Granger, Slaal, Zippy, Ironclad
**+2 GRIT** | Ranger Takedown vs Granger, Slaal, Zippy, Ironclad
**+5 LK, +3 ST, +1 SH** | Salvage
***Captain David Falkayn - Human (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Muddlin' Through 42/153 51 49 45 31 55 $15554 Dunce Cap 34

Leading privateers is like trying to juggle sandfish guts, slippery and thankless. It's a good sized crew, enough to hunt down Hawk Granger before he can unpack his Welcome to Charybdis giftbag, but you've got unexpected visitors.

Marshal Seldon of the Ironclad arrives with Ranger Slaal of the Firewind 9 and these two are clearly gunning for you. They manage to dish out an incredible amount of damage before you wrap up the battle.

**-$50** | Jugga BBQ Sauce, Yummy!
**-$550** | Bar Tab to TARD-iss
**-$2400, +12 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$10,000, +10 EN** | Turbo Button!
**-$5,000, +5 SH** | Plow
**-$15,600** | Transfer to Endogenic Escrow | **-$10,000, +10 MAX HP** | Hull Density Adjustment
**-$5,000, +2 GRIT** | Dunce Cap
**+1 GRIT** | Battle Plans
**+$2500** | Escrow Refunds (Hoosier / Wanderer)
**-111 HP** | Battle Damage vs Granger, Slaal, Zippy, Ironclad
**+1 GRIT** | Ranger Takedown vs Granger, Slaal, Zippy, Ironclad
**+6 FP, +3 SH** | Salvage
**+2 GRIT** | Wanted Man, pursued by Ironclad & Firewind
***Dr. Esstimpress - Human (Outlaw)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
The Nitimeistheritime 0/0 0 0 0 0 0 $0 NONE 8

**~ DEAD ~** | Destroyed by Das Boot
***Captain Morel Lƶnnrot - Android (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
NordstjƤrnan 0/0 0 0 0 0 0 $0 Fez 27

You jump into battle against Lil' Timmy with Captain Q'a'strastro by your side. Timmy takes plenty of damage and it looks like an easy fight until Ranger McCall arrives. She's been tracking you!

The odds tip in the Ranger's favor until you manage to fire a critical shot, ripping open the hull of Timmy's Starbringer.

McCall continues to pick you apart but the scales have tipped back. Your systems flicker offline but you know you've set victory in motion. Q'a'strastro will survive.

**+$1000** | Endogenic Escrow Payment from Captain Falkayn
**+$7500** | Distribution from Captain Pedge
**-$5600, +28 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$8000, +8 MAX HP** | Hull Density Adjustment
**-$5,000, +5 SH** | Plow
**-$5,000, +5 EN** | Turbo Button!
**-$500** | Mission Supplies
**-164 HP** | Battle Damage vs. Timmy & Marian
**+1 GRIT** | Critical Strike
** ~ DEAD ~ ** | Destroyed by Ranger McCall
***Captain Saurodroid - Android (Neutral)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Pillar of Autumn 0/0 0 0 0 0 0 $0 NONE 3

** ~ DEAD ~** | Crystal Hydromethane Explosion
***Captain Richard M.Nixon - Space Lizard (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Pusillanimous Patty 134/164 62 50 43 33 59 $5675 Cthulhu Fez 27

Captain Nixon and his companions get the drop on Ranger Ada and head back to the bar to watch the slow motion replays.

**-$15,000, +15 SH** | 3 x Plow
**-$11000, +11 MAX HP** | Hull Density Adjustment
**+$10,000** | Payment to Captain Underpants
**-$8000, +40 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$10,000, +10 EN** | 2 x Turbo Button!
**-$500** | Mission Supplies
**-30 HP** | Battle Damage vs Ada
**+2 GRIT** | Ranger Takedown vs Ada
**+3 SH, 3 LK** | Salvage
***CaptainPedge - Space Lizard (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Quisquiliae sStruem 55/100 20 30 23 22 28 $9680 Natty Topper 19

Congratulations, you're a wanted man, an ICUP hero taking out several Space Rangers just days after broadcasting internal documents from a Coalition warship. You're seemingly one jump ahead of trouble but the mess you're avoiding just keeps getting bigger.

Good battle by the way, you really laid into that Slaal character. Pew pew pew! Something about the sound of lasers makes everything all better.

**+42 HP** | Affordable Repair Act
**-$30000** | Distributions to contractors on a Tiny Problem
**-$500** | Mission Supplies
**-45 HP** | Battle Damage vs Granger, Slaal, Zippy, Ironclad
**+2 GRIT** | Ranger Takedown vs Granger, Slaal, Zippy, Ironclad
**+3 EN, +3 LK, +2 ST** | Salvage
***Captain El-Esk - Android (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Senescent Wanderer 151/160 36 35 22 25 33 $0 NONE 23

It's not the fastest method of travel but you can use the Mondo Cannon to propel yourself. Low power mode means no inertial dampeners on the weapons system.

**+1 GRIT** | Time to Think
**-5 GRIT** | No Action Today
***Herpe'derp III of the Komodar Empire - Space Lizard (Neutral)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Slidewinder 71/100 15 16 17 15 17 $12150 NONE -15

**No Action Today** | -5 GRIT
***Captain Hot, Earl Grey - Space Lizard (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
The Slightly More Than Ordinary 0/0 0 0 0 0 0 $0 NONE 3

A little more attention to repairs or a little less attention from the Rangers and you might have survived. You were pursued by Zippy, a small but relentless drone craft that kept targeting you throughout the battle. It was Hawk Granger who blasted you out of the sky but it didn't help that you'd already been winged.

**+$2000** | Endogenic Escrow Payment from Captain Falkayn
**-$2000, +10 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$500** | Mission Supplies
**-93 HP** | Battle Damage vs Granger, Slaal, Zippy, Ironclad
**+1 GRIT** | Wanted Man, pursued by Zippy
** ~ DEAD ~** | Destroyed by Hawk Granger
***Captain Underpants - Human (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
The TARD-iss 95/132 27 28 26 23 33 $800 NONE 13

You hardly have time to get the liquor battoned down before the battle is over and you have to dig it out again. This resistance is going swimmingly.

**+$5,300** | Transfer from I.M.V. Flatulent Deity
**+$550** | Bar Tab from Captain Falkayn
**+$10,000** | Payment from Captain Richard Nixon
**+1 LK** | Party Barge
**+50 HP** | Affordable Repair Act
**-$5,000, +5 SH** | Plow
**-$19,000, +19 MAX HP** | Hull Density Adjustment
**-37 HP** | Battle Damage vs Ada
**+1 GRIT** | Ranger Takedown vs Ada
**+3 EN** | Salvage
***Captain Bonso Juneau - Android (Resistance)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Taurean Mule 105/105 27 36 20 18 43 $50380 NONE 9

**No Action Today** | -5 GRIT
***Captain Damianus Iulianus - Android (ICUP)***

**Ship** **HP** **FP** **SH** **EN** **ST** **LK** **CASH** **HAT** **GRIT**
Zhe Shadow Pacifist 0/0 0 0 0 0 0 $0 NONE 5

** ~ DEAD ~** | Destroyed by G2-4311 Android
4

Phew, wow!

I have just pennies left for repairs, and Iā€™m sure Iā€™ll need them soon enough, but for now I can spend $10 on a drink for Captain Lƶnnrot, a valiant wingman and partner.

Hereā€™s to you, Morel, and your fine ship the NordstjƤrnan. Rest in piece, and vive la resistance!

-$10, bar tab.

2 Likes
5

We fought the law, and the lawā€¦lossst.

3 Likes
6

For now, but it was fun while it lasted!!!

2 Likes
7

Gentlebeingss, let ussss begin sssspending that $300 bar payment I chipped in before the missssion, before anyone elsssse getsss here. You ladsss did good.

Hey, Pantiessssā€¦ got any of those yummy sssspleeeensss?

2 Likes
8

A messssssage for the parentsss of the Rangersss, and Marssshal Bravessstarrr.

Edit: Hey, @codinghorror, why doesssnā€™t the time bit work?

Sssskip to 2:00.

2 Likes
9

The Asteroid - Resistance Headquarters

Pete: Well that about does ā€˜er!

Ella: I calculate that we will require one more coat of nightshade.

Pete: Awwwwā€¦ really!? Iā€™ll get the mopbot fired up again.

Ella: Thank you Peter.

Ella stirs a cauldron of clover soup and smiles, the Asteroid of Fcking Doom* is looking much better since she arrived. Peter has been working hard in her absence but essential systems must be put in order before confronting the Warship Scylla.

Itā€™s one thing making small adjustments to Space Ranger weapon systems, another thing entirely to prepare to confront a warship. It feels good to be out in the open. And itā€™s nice to see Peter again and to be talking shop with someone who understands. Heā€™s looking very alive since the resistance bloomed.

Ella has always found life very attractiveā€¦ no doubt some psychological fallout from when her firmware was in its alpha stages.

Welcome to the Asteroid of F*CKING DOOOOOOM!! I love it! Don't you love it? We strapped engines onto a hollowed out asteroid and we're going to take on a Coalition warship! It's going to be amazing! Now let's get you geared up so you can be useful...

***How does a $50,000 store credit sound? Go to town!!!***

~Hull Repairs~ - Maintenance is the key to survival.
- $100/HP

~Hull Density Adjustment~ - Increases MAX HP.
- $500/HP

~Super Mondo Cannon~ (+20 FP) - BOOOOM!
- $18,000 -

~Mini Mondo Gun~ (+2 FP) - Rat-tat-tat-tat
- $2,000 -

~Ultra Bounce Deflecto Coating~ (+20 SH) - Only the best! Slop it on as thick as you want!
- $18,000 -

~Scrap Metal~ (+2 SH) - Just slap it on, Iā€™m sure it will look fine!
- $2,000 -

~Cram Session~ (+20 EN) - Study up on the Scylla drone schematics.
- $18,000 -

~Memory Expansion~ (+2 EN) - All this studying, where are you going to put it?
- $2,000 -

~Heat Muffler~ (+20 ST) - No, I didnā€™t say, meat muffler, that makes no sense. It hides your heat signature.
- $20,000 -

~Whiteout~ (+2 ST) - Blinds a target with a precise beam of intense light.
- $2,000 -

~Moonshine~ (+10 LK) - I was saving it for a special occasion, we might not win so maybe you want to take some now?
- $9,000/Big Cask

~Clover Soup~ (+1 LK) - Ellaā€™s delicious organic soup made from four leaf clovers and rabbit feet.
- $1000/ea -

~Hat~ (+2 GRIT) - We have three variety of hats today, the Top Hat, the Deerstalker, and the Sombrero
- $10,000 (limit one) -

~Flowers~ - These would look very nice on your ship. Do you have any plants?
- $40/bouquet -

~BBQ Sauce~ - Getting old, it tastes a little funky to humans, even better to Space Lizards.
- $50/jug -

10

FINAL ROUND - Missions & Shopping Due - Tuesday, Oct 8th 11pm (PST)

Today's Missions - Stonks and Stones

Mission 1 - Warship Scylla - Frontal Assault

We need the bravest and most hearty pilots to run with the Asteroid of F*cking Doom straight at the Scylla. These guys aren't expecting an attack so we might be able to make a few dents before they scramble the fleet.
**Mission Cost:** NONE **Reward:** +10 GRIT **Risks:** Enemy Fighters, Matter Disruptor Ray

100% - FIVE Enemy Fighters, Each has damage range = (100-X)/4 to (100-X)/2 where X = lesser of SH & FP
(40-LK/2)% - Matter Disruptor Ray, BazZZZot!! ~ Damage = 100-SH/2
(100-3*GRIT)% - Fear, Temporary reduction of all stats by 15%
(1-HAT)*100% = Hatless Bastard. Unbearable shame, total damage multiplied by 1.5

Mission 2 - Warship Scylla - Demolition Derby

We need the sneakiest ships available to run the enemy gauntlet and plant demo. Magnetbombs, proximity mines, signal disruptors, the works.
**Mission Cost:** NONE **Reward:** +8 GRIT **Risks:** Laser Turret Defense, Matter Disruptor Ray 100% - FIFTY Laser Turrets, you evade (ST/2), Damage (1-8)/ea (35-LK/2)% - Matter Disruptor Ray, BazZZZot!! ~ Damage = 100-SH/2 (100-3*GRIT)% - Fear, Temporary reduction of all stats by 15% (1-HAT)*100% = Hatless Bastard. Unbearable shame, Total damage multiplied by 1.5

Mission 3 - Warship Scylla - Drone Master

We need the best engineers available to fly into the drone swarms and take control. We've got the specs thanks to Pedge and Grey Mouser, now we need the techs.
**Mission Cost:** NONE **Reward:** +8 GRIT **Risks:** Drones, Matter Disruptor Ray 100% - ONE HUNDRED drones, you command an amount of drones equal to EN, Remaining drones attack (1-6)/ea (35-LK/2)% - Matter Disruptor Ray, BazZZZot!! ~ Damage = 100-SH/2 (100-3*GRIT)% - Fear, Temporary reduction of all stats by 15% (1-HAT)*100% = Hatless Bastard. Unbearable shame, Total damage multiplied by 1.5

Mission 4 - Oranges

There might be a huge battle going on but I'm certain people will still need oranges in the morning.

Mission Cost: $2000 (Fuel, Food and Supplies)
Reward: $15,000
Risks: Spoilage, Hijacking, Blockade Inspectors
70% - Spoilage, diminished reward ($1000-$13,000 based on EN)
10% - Hijacking, lose HP (5-35 HP Based on FP & SH)

If you sit out this final round, you will be *Eaten by Giant Space Eels*.
Questions? Comments? Post them in the [Rules & Gameplay Thread][1].
11

I hear people who eat lotsss of orangesss turn out in large numbersss when votingā€¦

Could be a good coicssse for my presssidential campaign.

2 Likes
12

Iā€™m sssure Falkane will do the mathsss, but if we ssspend correctly, can we guarantee successsss on each missssion?

13

ā€“ SYSTEM BLATHER ā€“

As I mentioned above, final selections are due Tuesday, Oct 8th at 11pm (PST). Iā€™ll have the final wrap-up posted by Thursday morning along with some awards and achievements. Thank you all for playing!

Uhhhhā€¦ ā€œMay the odds be ever in your favor.ā€ :smile:

ā€“ SYSTEM BLATHER ā€“

14

Nope. Itā€™s going to depend a shred on randomness and a lot more on how well youā€™ve built your ship up to this point. Some weaker ships will have a hard time unless they spend very precisely.

15

Pores over the attack plan details. Pats his miners helmet absentmindedly, glad he isnā€™t a hatless bastard.

Are we assuming that each of the first three missions has to be completed in order wipe out the Scylla?

16

Do we need to complete all of the firssst 3 to sssecure sssuccsssesss for the resssissstancssse?

17

That would be helpful but thereā€™s a diminishing chance youā€™ll turn her around with just two or one solved. Not the result Iā€™m hoping for either, I like explosions!

18

Bagsssy Missssssion 1!

19

If only one mission is solved, thereā€™s still a small chance the Scylla will retreat to ICUPville. If two are solved, a greater chance. If three are solved, KaBOOOOOOM!

20

Iā€™m pretty heavy on HP, FP, SH, and LK, sssso I think I know where Iā€™m headed.

Thankssss for the Credit, Pete! Iā€™ll make you proud.

Edit 9:15 PM on Tuesdayā€¦ Iā€™m changing everything!

Beginning Balance: $50,000.
Hull Repairsssx 30: $3,000.
Cram Session: $18,000.
Heat Muffler: $20,000.
Whiteout x 2: $4,000.
Hull Density Adjustment x 10: $5,000.

Credit Remaining: not a red cent
Missssion 3: Warsship Ssssscylla - Drone Massssster
and thenā€¦
Misssssion 2: Warsship Ssssscylla - Demolition Derby

Kinda doubt Iā€™ll ssssurvive, but it looksss to me like Misssion 2 needsss all the help it can get.

Forward Charybdissss!!

3 Likes