Man beaten with garden gnome

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On the one hand, I think it’s time Australia acknowledged that it needs stronger gnome control laws.

On the other hand, if gnomes are outlawed then only outlaws will have gnomes…

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I think I did that to someone in Fallout once…

Was the victim named O’Reilly, by any chance, and was the gnome actually inserted?

Oh, and duck is well and truly off.

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Wait until somebody proposes licensing and registration of garden gnomes and special permits for concealed carry.

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Did the guy discover later that his underpants were missing?

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That picture is messed up. You want to shoot with both eyes open.

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…and now I want a garden gnome in fatigues and with an AK47…

Wait, aren’t those “Get off my lawn gnomes”?

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Not really, the cane toads keep their numbers in check.

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We have no culture of concealed weapons. Driveways are a different matter.

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Sure it wasn’t Half-Life 2?

Nah, this is Australia we’re talking about. If there’s a spree beating and a ban is called for they’ll hand over the deadly dwarfs without a fuss. None of this “from my cold dead hands” malarky for the Aussies — they’re much too civilised (although it pains me to say it).

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