Refreshing Lenin's corpse for his 145th birthday

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Dear God I hope it’s a part-time job - like, they call in the experts once a year or as needed. Can you imagine doing this full-time? [insert horror-face]

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It’s tempting to wrinkle my nose at what those weird Russians are up to, but the word games we play, to pretend this is the same kind of republic the founding fathers created, they are in the same league!

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Refreshing Lenin’s corpse. Lemon-scented Lenin’s corpse. Newly-polished Lenin’s corpse.

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Seems like a dead end job…

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Given what’s been replaced by now, why would the state go to such a cost to preserve dead or likely-fake flesh? What’s to say they’ve not simply replaced the body already with a fake? Seems like a ridiculous waste of time and money to such places.

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I have been totally (and inexplicably) fascinated with this since I first read about it years ago.
It’s just SO WEIRD that you’d invest this sort of time and brainpower in… that.

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Tourism, I guess.

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If they replace every part of Lenin with another one, is it still the same Lenin?

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#YOU GET TWO LENINS! 

(source)

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LENIN’S CORPSE IS A TWERKING-FREE ZONE!

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A businessman checks into a hotel at the Red Square. The next day he sends a telegram home: “Send a thousand barrels of mouse oil.” When asked why, he describes the long queue in front of the building labeled “Maus oleum”.

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I want to put a sign on it “do not tap on glass”

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What about animatronic eyelids?

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What a waste of resources. And just plain creepy. Same thing for the Chairman Mao’s display in Tienanmen Square. And that one is a huge blot in the middle of a great public space. Why is it we humans feel such a need to worship individuals?

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If you ever meet me then you will finally understand…

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Yes, a few minor alterations, and the world will quake in fear at the ascendance of zombie cyborg Lenin.

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True, but it’s particularly weird given that the country Lenin represents doesn’t exist anymore – not just in a figurative sense of time passing and culture evolving as in the US, but literally. This would be like a future where the US broke up but a piece of it calling itself “The Southeastern Republic” still obsessed about Ben Franklin and John Adams.

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Great. Now THAT’s on his ‘to do’ list as well…

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