Originally published at: Absurd trolley problems | Boing Boing
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I trolleyed 65 people
I only trolleyed 59. 
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Once we get all this gun stuff out of the way, we need to stop the trolley violence.
(got 66)
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“A strange game. The only winning move is not to play.”
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71, but some were my clones and some were myself reincarnated, and then there were the sentient robots. Partial credit?
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39 here, but I played for low numbers.
I think the most interesting one was do I shorten 1 person’s lifespan by 50 years, or 5 people’s by 10?
I figured inflicting misery on one person was less problematic than inflicting it on 10.
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I trolleyed 51. I’m not certain that all of them were humans (5 lobsters vs 1 cat?). I tried to take the choices “seriously” but some of them seemed just too creatively absurd.
The rich guy who offers $500k to flip the switch? Yeah he gets trolleyed. Easy.
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The correct solution to the original trolley problem is to wait until the front wheels of the trolley have passed the switch, then quickly throw it so the back wheels go down the other track, turning the trolley sideways and flipping it into a roll that hits all of the victims equally, as well as killing those aboard the trolley. It’s the only fair solution where nobody is treated differently after all.
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I killed 68, but solved philosophy. So that’s something
eta: If there’s a trolley heading for 68 people, do you pull a lever that would make it destroy the answers to all philosophical questions instead?
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Wow, 76% of people would kill five elderly people instead of one baby? That’s grim.
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I killed 63, but accidentally clicked the wrong answer twice. From that, I learned that I should never be given the lever.
ETA just to be clear “wrong” means the answer I didn’t mean to choose.
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Only 54 hypothetical people were harmed in me solving philosophy; though I did click the “wrong” button a couple of times. I’d like to see Abigail Thorn taking this test.
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If sentient robots don’t care enough to back-up their software, why should I care enough to save their hardware?
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i killed 84 fake people
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I killed exactly 68 as well, wonder did we make all the same choices…
Anyway: this clearly proves beyond any doubt that the National Trolley Association are correct - what society really needs is a good guy with a trolley.
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I only managed to kill 47. The lobsters elected me as their king. I have a trident and philosophy.
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