"After School Satan Club" could be coming to elementary schools in the U.S

needs more fish. hey @japhroaig, can you help us here?

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Oops, did my karma run over your dogma?

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If you haven’t heard its respective album, Like Clockwork, you are (as XKCD would say) one of ‘today’s lucky ten-thousand’. Seriously, I envy you. It’s a-freaking-mazing. It’s also an intensely existential album. Like vultures in the desert, the music and lyrics circle around the whole impending-death-as-a-speck-of-life reality as the rotting albatross it is. So you’ll hear lyrics like this:

Fallen leaves realize they are no friend of autumn
The view from Hell is blue sky
So ominously blue
Daydream until all the blue is gone

—‘Keep Your Eyes Peeled’

I don’t know what time it was
I don’t wear a watch
So good to be an ant who crawls
Atop a spinning rock

—‘My God Is the Sun’

Shock me awake
Tear me apart
Pinned like a note in a hospital gown
Prison of sleep
Deepened now
A rabbit hole never to be found
Again

—‘I Appear Missing’, which is pulled directly from Josh Homme’s near-brush with death after going into ventricular defibrillation during heart surgery and probably accounts for the scope of the album as a whole

Most of what you see my dear is purely for show
Because not everything that goes around, comes back around you know

—‘Like Clockwork’

It is a beast of an album and ‘I Appear Missing’ turned me into a puddle, which is just goddamned crazy given that this is the same band that penned the self-consciously vacuous ‘Feel Good Hit of the Summer’.

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Knock knock.

Who’s there?

Ether

Ether who?

Ether bunny!

Knock Knock

Who’s there?

Anne

Anne who?

Anne other Ether bunny!

Knock Knock

Who’s there?

S’more

S’more who?

S’more Ether bunnies!

Knock Knock

Who’s there?

Cargo

Cargo who?

Cargo beep beep, run over all the Ether bunnies!

Knock Knock

Who’s there?

Boo

Boo who?

Don’t cry, Ether bunny’ll be back next year!

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And I was kind of looking for some new tunes!

You’ve done me more than one good deed today! I owe you! :slight_smile:

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The first rule of Jesus Club is never shut up about Jesus Club.

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You’re in! Just be mellow and groovy…err, and help us plot! :slight_smile:

I like!

I like the ‘Church of the Gleeful Agnostic’ as a name, but I wonder if there’s something even better we can do? We definitely want to stay in the ‘Church’ field, because that’s the competition, and we definitely want to have something that implies ‘gleefully awesomely uncertain’ in some way, shape, or form. I think that attitude/vibe is kind of crucial.

Any better ideas? Groovy is an underused word that kind of fits the bill, but might be a bit mellower than what we’re looking for.

We’ll also need a set of mottos! I like the no ‘dogma/catma/carma/etc’ concept, that’s awesome. I also think we need a ‘Puppies and kittens are delightful’ and ‘meanness sucks’ in some manner. And of course the ‘we have no clue and that’s okay!’. Let’s ride the happy/fun/goofy vibe, that’s SO underutilized! And imagine a church of happy, shiny people that isn’t actually a church, but gobbles up people who were raised to think that’s important and exploits all their laws (damn…earworm)

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We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty!

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What does this remind me of? It’s VERY Douglas Adams!

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…because it is Adams?

Majikthise and Vroomfondel objecting to Deep Thought.

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That might be it! (I’m a dork)

It was some guards or something, wasn’t it?

I’m old and things kind of blur after a while! I’m still worried I’ll learn something new and forget how to drive. :wink:

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The Philosopher’s Union didn’t want the answer to life, the universe and everything to be known. It’d put them out of a job.

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That’s it!

Douglas Adams is definitely one of our honorary prophets! :wink:

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We can close the thread now. Nothing left to say here.

ETA: The reason I love this is that it reminds me of this apocryphal exchange:

One day Yanguan called to his assistant, “Bring me the rhinoceros fan.”

The assistant said, “It is broken.”

Yanguan said, “In that case, bring me the rhinoceros.”

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Noo! Keep it going! This thread is made of gems!

And @teknocholer has been hitting them out of the park!

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I blush.

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Thanks for covering this! Just to note, what’s attributed to the Salt Lake Tribune is actually from the Washington Post

If you like what the Satanic Temple is doing, you can donate here!

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Is it just me, or does it seem like the satanic temple are just doing this for the sake of being devil’s advocate?

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I sense the Satanists are the underdogs in this fight. A “Good News Clubs” vs. “Bad News Bears” scenario, if you will.

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