AI Christmas carol: "Mild is Rudolph"

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I think that All Hail to Rudolph is just a hair’s breadth away from being a Tenacious D christmas single

Oh look! There’s Santa and Parson Brown
Defying the laws of time and space
Now prepare yourself and your family my boy
Prepare to get your Christmas fix

Now Rudolph goes smashing through the roof
Just like a power lift with a candy-cane moustache
And the deer’s nose is dead-on, deadly accurate
Pow! Now it’s Rudolph versus Mars


This sounds quite creepy. Is Rudolph murdering kids?


My favorite is still:

Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer , with its red belly
The All-gracious King of all the earth,
Had a baby at Christmas time,
On Christmas Day,
A true and holy Deity,
Went down to earth,
With human flesh for sacrifice.

For sinful men such a Deity doth appear,
And wink and nod in reply,
As he winked and nod in reply,
As he winked and nod in reply

The wretched world is run by ox and ass
The wretched world is run by ox and ass,
And in vain build I.

It really touches all the bases for Christmas songs, and perversely hints at a coherent religion behind it all.


A VA did a (highly ominous) reading of this one, and in vain build I it’s pretty good.


Someone sang it after running it through, and using a tune generated via, Open AI Jukebox. The lyrics got a bit scrambled and ended up even better:


We’re laughing at AI now. but it won’t be quite so cute a few decades from now.


they’ll keep us laughing

eventually they will be better than we are at humor just like they’re better at chess now


Mild is Rudolph; mild as in ‘mild sedative’.


That’s got a real Yeats’ vibe for me.

“The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.”


Always found him gamey


I often think that a religion based solely on Christmas songs and movies would do well: the Christmastian religion.

Some of the books: the Gospel according to Rudolph, First and Second Christmas Chronicles, “Little” St. Nick


This one works particularly well because mixed-up as it is, it maintains certain key elements of the source material - omnipotent deity has child as human sacrifice, magical reindeer, etc., even if the particular relationship between the elements is new. I’m reminded of all the weird things Japan has done with importing Christmas as a purely commercial holiday, which led to someone inventing the ultimate conclusion of that confusion - the (sadly apocryphal) story of a holiday display of a crucified Santa…

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And cue a new cult being formed, in 3… 2…

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