Originally published at: Another roadside attraction: The Thing! | Boing Boing
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I’ve seen the Thing. It’s just the corpse of a Chinese coolie.
I wouldn’t lie, human.
Then they came upon The Thing:
Questions are essential. [OBJ] believes in the Socratic method. But the questions they ask at The Thing? Mystery of the Desert are the wrong questions. Those are questions with safe answers.
- Are there aliens? - Yes. Mark Zuckerberg. Q.E.D.
- Do the aliens have humanity’s best interests at heart? - No. Mark Zuckerberg. Q.E.D.
- Was that 1937 Rolls Royce really used by Winston Churchill? - Don’t be ridiculous. Winston Churchill was terrified of automobiles, that’s why he had a zip line installed between 10 Downing Street and the Palace of Westminster. Londoners were accustomed to looking up and seeing him speed down the road with his mini-poodle, Rufus, dangling in a harness beneath him. The cry “Ahoy! I spy the moon at noon!” became popular at that time, much to Churchill’s chagrin.
A particularly incompetent re-enactment. Note that the poodle has already been rescued. Priorities matter.
Better questions to ask, questions with dangerous answers, would be:
- What did Janet Prince really find in the desert and why was Eisenhower so upset about it?
- Why was the USGS put in charge of the AZ national guard in August 1963, and what were they doing in Texas Canyon on New Year’s Eve?
- What became of the infrasonic soil-liquefaction device that Nicola Tesla built for the USGS?
- What happened to the original town of Dragoon, AZ in 1964? No one in Benson wants to talk about it, but even the Mojave can’t swallow all the evidence. [OBJ] has preserved many artifacts over the years - a Howard Johnson’s placemat signed by Roy Acuff, a size 17 bowling shoe with the initials “C.F.” written on the back of the tongue, a 1938 Hupmobile hubcap containing a mysterious substance that is probably not coyote scat.
A picture forms if you squint at those dots - a picture of malfeasance and coverup, power and fear.
Is it aliens?
No.
It is something much worse.
[OBJ]
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It would certainly be fun/not fun if the Bowlin Travel Center sold The Stuff to folks visiting The Thing.
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The title confused me.
I know America is famed for roadside attractions.
I just assumed there was a massive (OBJ) at the side of the road.
Someone needs to start tracking these things. 
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There’s an app a thread for that:
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Yeah, I like that thread, was only joking.
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A big pink swirly thing from space?
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