Badass Dragons of the Wasteland - Round Four Results!

games
8 
  ______________________________________________
|      _                                _       | |\
|    /   \    JUNIOR'S JOURNAL        /   \     | ||
|   (  O  )      THE CITADEL         (  O  )    |,""---:___
|    \ _ /                            \ _ /     ||==  | .-.|
|                                               ||==  | '-'-----.
|_______________________________________________||    |~  |   -(|
   |_____________________________/<  _...==...____|   |   | ___ |
         \\ .-.  .-. //       \|  \//.-.  .-.\\ --------"-"/.-.\_]
          ( o )( o )                ( o )( o )"""""""""""==( o )
           '-'  '-'                  '-'  '-'               '-'

Well, we all knew the Main Audience Chamber was going to be a trap. Still, I wondered whether there might not be a way to exit gracefully.

I needed a plan.

  1. Ideation. We needed to be “real entertaining.” Hat-tip to Jane.
  1. Initiation. Mighty thanks for those flapjacks, Dorcas.
  1. Implementation:
  • One part digestion (thanks, pancakes)
  • One part Beer-Bong (you know Junior has one of these on-hand)

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  1. Inspiration:

Some of you may remember, long ago, other games of sport that awarded gold and silver to the winners, not cold death to the losers. I remember watching some ice skaters back then, they were in some far off place called Srirachi, in Russia. And those skaters used to try to pull off more difficult moves to impress the judges.

I needed the Triple Lutz of Tractor Pulling. . … …

I needed to Ghost-Ride the Whip.

  1. Inebriation

Let’s Do This!

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  1. The Aftermath: Irritation.

Well, I won the tractor pull, straight up, against two of Fleetwood’s best contenders. After the axle broke on the second mule he put up against me (a volvo COE, haha!), Fleetwood stopped throwing challenges at me and put me on DJ duty. I didn’t need to have done the fancy ghost ride move, because, though I didn’t know at the time, Fleetwood wasn’t interested in the high art of tractor pulling. He only wanted to weaken the force at the Ark so his man Toecutter could get in. The flapjack fueled effluence would have been enough to give me the TQ to win.

And my Gen I system, sock gaskets and all, was enough to handle that pancake fuel.

My body, however, was not ready. I felt the flames of 'roids hit me half way through the first pull, and by the time Samson and Delilah had fallen I was fading in and out of consciousness due to the blood loss. I was the last one out of the Citadel, because I promised to play this for someone, but I passed out coming through the breach and hit the side, collapsing a good bit of roof on my head, knocking me out.

Muchas Gracias to Word ( @Solomon) for dragging me out.

Anyone got any Preparation H?

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