Bear trapped in Subaru follies

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I feel bad for the insurance agent that has to file that report.


Back in the 90s, I had a friend who went to Yosemite, and didn’t follow directions: she left an empty cooler in the back of her hatchback, and then went out backpacking. A black bear casually peeled the hatchback off the car, chewed up the cooler, and shredded some of the upholstery for good measure.

After getting the insurance agent to stop laughing, she thought everything was OK. Then they rejected her claim as being an uncovered “Act of God.” She then sent a letter saying that when she took them to court that they’d better have theologians on staff to defend the assertion that God was a Black Bear. Not surprisingly, they backed down and paid.


This is what happens when you let Boo-Boo watch too much TV…


Who needs closed captions when you can just blast a giant font all over an already low-res video to make actually seeing anything just that much easier! Did some retart truly believe they were making things somehow better?

Speaking of Drudge…


I want to hear the audio recording of this woman explaining this to her insurance agent. “So, am I covered for that?”

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Sounds like the start of a joke: “So this bear drives a Subaru up to a house in Golden…” A quote of Eugene Mirman’s came immediately to mind:

“One of the best things I found out about Detroit is that bears have started returning to the city. When bears are gentrifying your neighborhood and opening Thai restaurants, that’s a poor neighborhood.”


Oh come on. The guy was probably giggling like crazy as he submitted it to claims. It is so much more fun than the usual, “I got hit coming out of a parking lot” or “the cab rear-ended me”.

Much kinder than a leg-hold trap.

Of COURSE it was in a huge hurry to get back to the woods. What self-respecting bear would shit in a Subaru?



Fucking Outback commercials have gotten ridiculous.

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