Because F#CK you, metric system!

Ikea releasing a meatball the size of a turkey

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poronkusema – (approximately 7.5 km). A Sami measurement of distance; the distance a reindeer can travel before needing to stop to urinate. Today used to describe something that is at a very obscure distance away.

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That seems like a lot or stopping to pee for the reindeer!

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Reindeer can’t pee while running, and they may experience paralysis if they don’t pee often enough.

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wow. the opposite of the “pee pee dance” - pee pee paralysis!

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I can’t either, unless I’m ok with wet leg,

as for the other half, when my back teeth are floating, I really can’t concentrate on much else…

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i’m okay with wet leg. kind of 90s pop punk, but… checks watch… written yesterday? really, they’re fun.

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I need a standard stoat, for science!

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Careful you don’t get a blackmarket weasel by mistake…

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No such thing, I’m afraid. They’re all stotally different from one another.

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I need an Imprerial stoat, for an end of week beverage!

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it’s true! the iguana forecast, that is.

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That’s when they’re so cold they lose their grip and fall from trees, ceilings, walls, etc., right?

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I see your stout and raise you a marten.

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yup.
and that’s because here we would use iggies as a temperature rather than say, “oh, my! it will drop to 7C tonight! look out for falling iguana’”

and for the record, here in the Conch, i’ve only seen that phenomenon once, when a smallish (say… 12-15 banana in length, because we could never say 1.25 meters…) green iguana dropped from the nieghbor’s tree into my yard some years ago.

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