Just look at those spoiler tags!
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I’d wear it too. I might wear the bottom the other way around, in case of fallout. I’d love to crochet one for my wife, but she does not care for bikinis. In fact, she’s not that keen on sandy beaches. Ah well.
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I knitted a lovely garment in hemp. It’s thin, it’s cool, it doesn’t stretch significantly. That would make fine beachwear.
House of Hemp
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I do not believe ANY 100% wool knitted swimsuit of ANY design will be ok for swimming in - unless you like the “baggy, falling away from your body” look when it is saturated with water. It would be very difficult to avoid ‘soggy bottom’ syndrome. 
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It’s made of cotton, not wool.
I am still very sceptical of its form retaining properties when wet. There’s a reason elasticated materials are used for body-form swimsuits.
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Hemp is great; have you used bamboo? Lightweight, dries quickly, wicks moisture away from the skin.
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Then you need to educate yourself about the properties of modern fibers, rather than relying on memories of turn-of-the-20th century bloomer-girls bathing suits.
Wool and cotton? Modern fibres? Ok then.
Yes I have… …but I can’t remember what I kniitted with it. Probably a hat.
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Rock on, with yo’ bad self.
Pity your wife doesn’t like the beach, but I can understand the aversion to sand; it gets everywhere.
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Have detested it all my life. 
Don’t like the smell of it either (especially the artificial version) ever since I was trapped in a classroom with mouth-breathing students sharing a pack of watermelon flavored Now & Later candy. The only melon I enjoy is honeydew, so of course most fruit salad is full of watermelon and cantaloupe.
My siblings like it, though. So, we joke that should be my “body snatchers” test. If they suspect I’ve been replaced by a doppelganger, they are supposed to offer it watermelon, and run like hell if it eats it. 
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As an 8 year old we used to play rugby wearing woollen shorts – always seemed to be on cold, wet days – the result was horribly chapped thighs and groin, lovely cotton ones were high on my wish list.
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yeah as much as i love bikinis seeing people uncomfortable isn’t really my scene
wookiemonster! 
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