Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/06/29/bizarre-cctv-footage-of-gas-st.html
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Meth, but also:
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And yet strangely, no one got shot.
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More detailed (1:45) version:
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Catch and release (eventually) is a good policy
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Transporter malfunction.
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Pairs surprisingly well with Yakety Sax.
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oddly, i kept wondering why she is running around in her underpants? or am I so old I have no clue about style anymore?
I did appreciate the drop tile ceiling fall.
and yeah - yakkity sax
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This is in Canada, eh.
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HOW is this not in Florida?!
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Keystone crooks?
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If they weren’t dumb as bricks, they wouldn’t be criminals.
Take the case of Zlatko Sikorsky for example. He starts a relationship with a runaway teenage girl half his age, kills her, stashes her body in a container in the tray of his ute then drives to McDonalds and uses her card to buy a meal. She is a missing person so of course there is a trigger on her account. McDonalds are plastered with CCTV so now there is a direct link from the girl to the card to the car to Sikorsky.
Realizing that he might have screwed up he dumps the ute and steals another car but in the process a woman sees an arm sticking out of the container in the ute and calls the cops. The last thing we hear he is in some sort of holiday unit in Queensland, waiting for the police to give up and call it a day, while said police wait for the coffee to run out so they can nab him in his sleep.
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THIS JUST IN
Scientists at the Planck Institute Of Theoretical Convenience Store Studies have confirmed the existence of surveillance footage that shows a mutant teleporting into the midst of a brawl. Action 11 News reached Dr. Linus Van Pelt for comment:
”It’s really quite remarkable, and a bit out of our normal line. Here at the Edmonton campus, our focus is on the kinetics of rolling hot dog heaters and the fluid dynamics of non-Newtonian, mesophasic syrup slush. We will need to do a frame by frame analysis of the tape before we can draw any major conclusions, but at first blush, it does appear that the young lady can teleport, cannot fly, and may possess tissues of an unusual durometer based on the height of her rebound off the end cap. These are exciting days to be a scientist in Theoretical Convenience Store Studies!”
Film at 11.
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Here is the video paired with “Way Out There” by Carter Burwell, most famous for being used in “Raising Arizona.”
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Her jeans and his shirt had been sold off to pay for meth. After that it was either shoplift from the gas station or sell off their remaining clothes, but the prime directive of moar meth would have remained.
If only they’d had the revelation Jessa Reed did:
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I believe this is a resurgence of what the elders referred to as the “hotpants.”
Also she’s down one shoe by the end there.
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She’s wearing shorts.
Hey thanks, now it synchs up even better with my divisive media-generated stereotypes about impoverished rural white people!
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