Boba beware! Researchers in Beijing warn of an "emerging hazardous addiction problem of milk tea among youths"

joe pesci youths GIF

I am sorely disappointed that it took 20 posts before this gif was ritually posted!

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Like a good cup of tea, these things can’t be rushed.

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No, they couldn’t. That could be any amount over 6.

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Bond__Tea_Earl Grey_Hot__FGD135__600x250

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The Korova Milkbar was a milk-plus mesto, and you may, O my brothers, have forgotten what these mestos were like, things changing so skorry these days and everybody very quick to forget, newspapers not being read much neither. Well, what they sold there was milk plus something else. They had no licence for selling liquor, but there was no law yet against prodding some of the new veshches which they used to put into the old moloko, so you could peet it with vellocet or synthemesc or drencrom or one or two other veshches which would give you a nice quiet horrorshow fifteen minutes admiring Bog And All His Holy Angels and Saints in your left shoe with lights bursting all over your mozg. Or you could peet milk with knives in it, as we used to say, and this would sharpen you up and make you ready for a bit of dirty twenty-to-one …"
– “A Clockwork Orange”, Anthony Burgess

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Ah, but is it:

  1. (At least 6) to 12
  2. At least (6 to 12)?

Either way, it seems sloppy.

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Well, they don’t give us the actual breakdown, but we do get this:

Specifically, 2.6 % of youths drank 4 to 6 cups of milk tea each week, while 20.6 % drank 2 to 3 cups weekly. This fact has rung a bell for all

The phrasing is not how a professional article would be written, and the “bell” is not clarified at all. So, yeah, not going to give this much credence. Nor clearwater, nor even revival.

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It simply means the lowest number that they consume in a typical month is between 6 and 11. Seems quite simple.

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Considering people need to drink some amount of liquid daily to stay alive, I find this… interesting
eyes coffee pourover

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In all seriousness, though, the findings about milk tea addiction being correlated with higher risks of depression, anxiety, and suicidal ideation among youth are alarming–I hope more research is done to further understand this connection and to address it.

Well, sounds to me like someone high up in the Chinese Communist Party doesn’t like “youths,” and asked “what do they do?” Now that they’ve identified milk tea, which in China has a myriad of recipes and styles, as part of youth culture it’s time to demonize and then ban and/or restrict access to just older folk. Its tea, at its heart, made with sugar, milk, and other ingredients. If drinking tea is causing depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts in kids and young adults, I’d look to the collapsing economy, war-mongers at the top of their government itching to invade their neighbors, and to living in one of the most polluted and environmentally damaged areas of the world rather than the tea.

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Boba is a big social thing in NorCal; my kid goes to tea joints in the same way I went to the mall in the late 80’s/early 90’s.

This “addiction” sounds made up.

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Here’s the abstract:


well-thats-bullshit-a67f820b0f

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Boba tea originated in Taiwan. They chose a thing that Chinese youth like that originated in a place they hate. Then they made it all up. Better to blame addiction on a drink originating in Taiwan than to face the fact many of China’s young people are in a mental health crisis, just like a whole lot of young people all over the world. After all, that mental illness can’t be from the youth being oppressed by their government and exploited by capitalism.

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That Boba Manifesto is wonderful, thanks!

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Chinese academia is under the thumb of the Party.

In formal terms, academic collaborations are overseen by Party committees and their agents at all levels. As a result, academics are constantly negotiating relationships. For the most part, you should be mindful of the fact that Xi-era academics are fundamentally members of the Skin-and-Hair Intelligentsia (皮毛知识分子 pímáo zhīshì fènzǐ), that is, the echelon of educated people created by Mao in the 1950s, and groomed under Xi Jinping: They are reliant on Party largesse and most (although by no means all) are incapable of substantially independent and effective intellectual and critical engagement with the nation’s political life.

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Everything in China is under the thumb of the Party; the army, banks, big businesses, the media.

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And the Party itself.

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Milky tea. You have to be careful with that stuff. First comes the tea consumption, then you have to start dealing opiates to fund the addiction, then you’re attacking people to protect the drug dealing business. Best to tackle this early on.

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MILKY TEA!

Bloody sacrilege, is what that is. You need the merest dash of milk for the perfect cuppa.
And WTF is that OP picture? Milk with raisins? Kids these days!

I wouldn’t touch that stuff for all the tea in… Oh.

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