Cashier calmly stops would-be beer thief


#1

Originally published at: http://boingboing.net/2017/06/23/cashier-calmly-stops-would-be.html


#2

And now the cashier will be sued for injuring the would-be thief, who was unjustly attacked.


#3

Beer drinkers. SMH

Go for the liquor. It’s smaller and easier to run with.


#4

I want to see how Cory would write up this same story!


#5

To quote Woody Allen: “The heart wants what it wants. There’s no logic to these things.”


#6

#7

I think that cashier was watching the ‘shopper’ and was anticipating that move. Otherwise, there is just no way…


#8

Shrooms are fun

https://www.instagram.com/p/BVXqKBRHDeo/


#9

Yeah, the clerk has this “Oh, boy, it’s this arsehole” look on his face.


#10

Well, he either planned it nicely, or improvised at the very last second. Either way… great move.


#11

Sigh. Judging from the front page, Boingboing has taken a cue from Worldstar.


#12

Ah, but with beer it’s easier to run after having drank it.


#13

Seriously, lots of pratfalls, dashcams, and 3 animal posts in a row.


#14

And now that beer is going to be all shaken up for its eventual legitimate purchaser. It’s a tragedy.


#15

Of course she anticipated it. He’s a black guy in an otherwise empty store. Where do you think the clerk was watching? The Slurpee machine?


#16

What a dummy. He should have casually approached the cashier with the beer and then yelled “PSYCH!” before detouring for the exit. Works every time. So I’m told.


#17


#18

That’s a heck of a super power there. A bit limited, but in the right situation…

“The Juggernaut was unstoppable, until Lunch Tray Man stepped in and brought him down long enough for Wolverine to remove his helmet and Professor X to stun him.”


#19

Seriously. It looks like he started running from the halfway point in the store. Had he casually grabbed the beer, maybe gone back into the other racks like he was still shopping, approached the register near the door and THEN bolted, he might have gotten away.

Of course, we’re talking about a beer thief. A person who probably didn’t have many prospects towards being a master thief.


#20

Oh, I thought it said bear thief. I wanted to see a bear stealing things. Now I’m disappointed.