Chicken eyeglasses are a real thing

Originally published at: Chicken eyeglasses are a real thing | Boing Boing


Have a chicken on the bbq, won’t forget the “chicken goggles”. Safety First!


Well, at least they look cool with them.




Wow, the movie Chicken Run just got even darker.


Turkeys and chickens are still rather primitive. My grandpap raised both and he had a separate ‘hospital shed’ that was used to hold pecking victims until they healed enough. I have never before seen these chicken-sized specs.

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I took a few business classes in grad school. 1996 or so. One of the Harvard Case Studies we did group analysis on was for red-tinted chicken glasses.

We had to figure out if chicken lives saved (in terms of eggs produced) was worth the cost of buying the specs and having them “installed.”

Our team came to a totally wrong conclusion because a student misread the profit on a dozen eggs as three dollars instead of three cents.


Barry beat you to it.

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This is actually why John Lennon wore rose-colored spectacles - to prevent him from eating the other three Beatles (after the Pete Best incident, RIP).
john lennon with anti-cannibal lenses


Take off rose colored glasses and things really do get real.


an absolute necessity for older chickens who don’t want the embarrassment of getting the pecking order wrong.

Please continue. You got me on the edge of my seat here. So then what?

I have a strong affection for rose colored glasses myself. Anyone try to install them on wild turkey, or quails? I suspect quail or pheasant would look most excellent in steampunk red goggles.

If we’d gotten the numbers right, our cost benefit analysis would have shown that the hen spex were not worth the trouble.

This can only fuel the “birds aren’t real” narrative. Drone Optics Upgrade.

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That adds up now that I think of it.

If you could dig up the dusty old study I could offer to do a peer review with even worse math, for posterity.

After all birds aren’t real; neither are published paper without peer review.

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I believe this is one of those behavioral issues that only became a widespread problem when we started imprisoning large numbers of chickens in confined areas lacking the physical and mental stimulation they would normally have in a healthier environment.

Kind of like de-horning cows to prevent them from goring each other. It’s not a problem that comes up often for cattle that are allowed to spend most of their lives grazing lush open hillsides, but it’s a big problem for cattle raised in hellish factory farm conditions.


Let me guess, they ended up as the CFO for a Fortune 500 company?


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