Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2019/08/28/chinas-using-linkedin-to-rec.html
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BRB, I’d better buff my résumé.
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Here 'ya go:
Unless the Chinese delivery guy comes into your office he’s not going to get any info.
Waaaay better interface than LinkedIn’s.
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Why didn’t the CIA think of this?
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Finally, someone found a good use for LinkedIn!
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As a purveyor of fine mixed metaphors myself, I bestow you props for most disgusting mixed metaphor for:
Assuming we are mixing the well known shit/fan and spaghetti/ready metaphors. Well done.
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I’ve never understood why anyone would accept a link/friend request on LinkedIn from someone they’ve never met. I get these all the time and it totally baffles me. I don’t know you, your job description has absolutely no relevance to mine, why did you try and link with me in the first place?
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Perhaps they’re looking for somebody with your credentials? Only one way to find out for sure!
I mean, does anyone else have a use for it? I eagerly signed up when I was working for a company that I was never sure would still exist the next day. When the layoffs came, I was ready. When I started getting notices about job openings, I was glad I did it… until I realized they were all bullshit.
I’d get messages from former co-workers telling me that there were jobs at their current companies. Great! I figured that since they knew my former position and skill-set, the jobs would be a good fit. I’d go through the interview process, never quite seeing the relevant position that must exist… and find out, after many hours, there were never any relevant job openings. After that happened a couple times, I realized my co-workers never sent me the messages in the first place (which is why they didn’t respond to my questions via LinkedIn either), they were entirely automatically generated by LinkedIn itself. Likewise, messages about job openings from companies and recruiters looking to fill positions were all useless junk, false connections auto-generated based on keywords. The problem being that the keywords had contextual meaning that was being totally ignored - they weren’t even in the same industry, much less was I the person they were looking for.
Now I just see LinkedIn as a hilarious shit-show.
I get these from recruiters, which (at first) seemed reasonable. Except that they’d quickly realize they were working in the wrong field and change industries. So now I’d be getting constant updates from strangers working in a field that I have no interest or connection to. I didn’t see an easy way to unlink, but I just started ignoring everything I get from LinkedIn anyways, so…
Given how automated much of LinkedIn is, I suspect at least some of these random friend requests must also be the result of wonky algorithms. (E.g. the one that looks at every email contact and sends them a friend request; I get requests from friends-of-friends I think as a result of that.)
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Wait till you see what spaghetti does to a fan! 
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I have in the past had interest in hiring for an unusual job. I got a demo of Linkedin’s backend stuff and it looked really excellent. You can trawl for individuals based on all kinds of things in their professional and educational profiles. They don’t have to be actively looking for jobs or accurately representing their experience to you. Sadly, it turned out to be too expensive for us.
I guess I’d consider spy to be an unusual job… and nations will certainly have a less restrained budget than I did.
I think Mossad has hacked my smart fridge. The Mogen David that was in there yesterday is gone…
The solution is still the same. If I haven’t met them in person, then I ignore the link request.
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